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The Culture that has been here all the time

When I was introduced to BDSM relationships, I realized they had existed probably for all of human history. Religion and Western Culture distort this and BDSM itself greatly, and if anything, an incredible hypocrisy is always present. Using codes and euphemisms, even denial can mask the fact that many people thrive within this often unrecognized subculture. For example, my wife had all the earmarks of a pleasure slave and was generally devoted and submissive to me. In times of marital friction, I often heard the words from a counselor, "She just wants you to love her." "Love her," I thought I was, and now I know without a doubt I need to be a Dominant, not some preconceived idea that we are to live as equals: we are not only one can be a Dom and one a sub at a time, but, it is perfectly fine if switching is desired at least now and then.
1 week ago. Thursday, May 14, 2026 at 9:00 AM

Why irony hits so hard
Irony works because it exposes the gap between:

what we expect
what reality delivers
And that gap is where humor, frustration, or insight lives.

I have been affected by irony too often in my life. When things turn out well, that is great, but when things go wrong. I become perplexed and confused. I like to reflect on my early teenage years: I tried to imitate pop culture: Blue suede shoes, black leather jackets, playing guitar, and singing. Yet the amazing thing was? Every girl I liked didn't like me, and the girls I didn't like liked me. This situation didn't clear up until later, when I began performing regularly in New York City with a band I created. Like a child in a candy shop, I wound up causing problems out of ignorance. Eventually, I had normal experiences of marriage, divorce, children, and remarriage. My marriage to my late wife was more than forty years. Most of that time, I got by in life by making mostly the right assumptions and decisions. Here I am, old, still functioning well, living the life of a widower. Every day, I discover something about that situation and something about myself. The most significant self-revelation? Despite some faux claim, I wanted to be a hermit; I truly believe I am not meant to be alone, but I am.

I have a great deal of interests and experience to share, and I have softened my hard-line misanthropy; like a swimmer putting one toe in a cold lake, I want to swim with people and seek a compatible companion to share this phase of my life.

pixabay

 

 


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