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Andron​(neither male)Verified Account

The Culture that has been here all the time

When I was introduced to BDSM relationships, I realized they had existed probably for all of human history. Religion and Western Culture distort this and BDSM itself greatly, and if anything, an incredible hypocrisy is always present. Using codes and euphemisms, even denial can mask the fact that many people thrive within this often unrecognized subculture. For example, my wife had all the earmarks of a pleasure slave and was generally devoted and submissive to me. In times of marital friction, I often heard the words from a counselor, "She just wants you to love her." "Love her," I thought I was, and now I know without a doubt I need to be a Dominant, not some preconceived idea that we are to live as equals: we are not only one can be a Dom and one a sub at a time, but, it is perfectly fine if switching is desired at least now and then.
1 year ago. Sunday, May 26, 2024 at 12:23 PM

Friends, I now know who or what I am: I am strictly a caregiver for my wife. I am neither a Dom nor a Sub, just a blank* with my job to do as something almost like a male nurse. 

Fun and happiness are not in my vocabulary. I have no activities that give me respite. A little TV, a plant or two, some music, and a little time with my pets have value, but that is all.

Each day, I live in the past and see nothing in my future.

Acceptance has taken a long time, with harsh lessons learned along the way.

I will look into a form of senior housing on Tuesday where I can move with my wife on one floor and a minimum of house and yard work. During the VA Share Group meeting, I heard fellow caregivers refer to a VA option for housing (I'll see).

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