Yes, Friends, I am thinking out loud again,
I was wondering how people define their soul mate.
Is it tangible? Does it happen immediately, or does it take time to manifest?
I've experienced that when two people are opposites in several ways, that doesn't seem to hinder the feeling of a soul mate if the differences are complementary. However, if the "in commonness" is too strong, this can create competitiveness and rule the relationship[ thus diminishing the enjoyment of togetherness?
I have discovered an indefinable aspect: When sharing time with some people, a sense of comfort and ease transcends the details. This can happen when two people just encounter each other briefly, and it engulfs them so quickly.
Thinking back to my youth, making friends seemed to happen quickly, but it has become challenging to make new friends now. Some of that is learned caution from disappointments and betrayals (perceived, at least).
My wife, with her cognitive disease, still has very slight fleeting moments of affection - this keeps me going. If we humans can anthropomorphize pets, even inanimate objects like dolls, I surely can amplify the tiny bit of affection my wife shows on occasion. She even attempts an I love you with her pronounced aphasia distorting her speech. Ironically, if I ask her, "Are we married?" She usually replies, "No."
I have a lot of practice masking my sorrows and depressive moods. If I see a neighbor or meet a healthcare worker, I can appear upbeat and unphased by the negatives surrounding me - I suppose this is preferable to being downtrodden and under a dark cloud. Yet, I cannot hide the way I feel from myself. Also, I always seemed to view the future with optimism - the view from now is, at best, uncertainty.
