The Culture that has been here all the time

I have one big secret for life as we age: use it or you lose it. OK, it isn't original. Joints that work together as I play guitar are working better since I practice each day. Singing voice has regained some range. My worn hip is even bothering me less because I cut the lawn (careful not to overdo it). My senses are good as I pet my cat and dog several times a day. A neighbor I did not know well, and I have conversations with now, and her husband, too, squeak me into socializing a minuscule bit. I compensate for a rusty drawing hand with old artists' tricks. Most of all, I use my brain for all of the above, plus a chess lesson every day and a theoretical physics video every day.  My favorites include Feynman because he is so eloquent to understand. One big fear.

My greatest fear is that as the hourglass dribbles grains of sand, the longer I lack a lover, the more sensuality and sexuality evaporate. I believe I can only go so long without a muse before I disappear from life.

The "Seven Grandfathers seem mute on the subject. Image borrowed from Google search.

Recently, I was told that since I was married three times and had a love life throughout my life, now that I am seventy-eight and my wife has died, I should not seek another companion/lover because I have had more than some people in this world. I know what I had was fulfilling, and I have been grateful, but should I give up and accept my fate as the song lyrics state (Is that All there Is?).

My kids and stepkids especially do not wish me well.  We tried to raise them with rules and teach them responsibility, while the other parents let them do as they wished without much guidance. So what do you think about their attitude? No surprise.

Mt dear blog readers, I have good and bad to report concerning my health checks yesterday, no surprise.

I have several arthritic joints, but my hip surprised the doctors because I keep moving, unlike many of their patients who complain and want fast answers. Mind over matter works for me. "I keep moving." I play guitar to overcome arthritis in my fingers (LOL). I eat lemons to keep on singing LOL.  I have a strong will, that is how I avoided a heart transplant from 2005 - 2010. Today, the CT scan of my aorta makes me a little nervous, but like other signs of aging, I "keep keeping on".

My lover and muse, wherever you are, I am not impatient, but do not wait too long to come to me. I need you.

Are your kinky thoughts just fantasies and wishful thinking, or are they something you actually desire? Are you constrained by something? Fear: Bad relationships, experiences like catching a STD or being hurt emotionally or possibly physically. Songwriters have a metaphor for you.

"Walk through the Fire"

"Walk the Fire"

"Ring of Fire"

Or Dance

"I hope you dance."

"The Dance"

Do something, don't just sit there and wonder what you MIGHT do or what it MIGHT be like.

I knew a guy who admonished me when I hesitated about doing something: He said, "Do something even if it is wrong." When you choose to move, you can always make a course correction.

Cut the head of some insects, and they still function for a time. Cut a worm in two, and the halves squirm and usually morph into two new worms.

The only reason I put forth these examples is to illustrate my current sense of being. The life force is struggling to reassert itself. Reinvent itself. Find a new identity: This is a good development, though my life is fraught with isolation and loneliness. I hope it will pass.