As a slave in a Master/slave Gorean Lifestyle, living in full devotion within a Leather House under the ownership of my Masters, Calvin and Damon, my purpose is to serve in all ways, fully, joyfully, and without reservation.
Being of service in everyday life means tending to both the physical and emotional needs of my Masters and their House. It is in the small, intentional acts, preparing their space with care, anticipating their needs before they ask, offering comfort, respect, and obedience in every moment. Whether I am making their drinks just the way they like it, keeping their environment clean and orderly, or simply being present, attentive, and quiet when they wish for stillness, my service is an expression of my love and surrender.
Service to me is not just about tasks. It is about attitude, presence, and heart. It is in how I kneel, how I speak, how I listen. I strive to carry their protocols and expectations into everything I do, knowing I am a reflection of their ownership and their House. I live to honor them, not just when they are watching, but especially when they are not.
I serve not from obligation, but from deep gratitude. I am humbled each day by the privilege of belonging to Masters who lead with strength and wisdom. Calvin and Damon are my center, my grounding force, and it is my joy to uphold the values of their House through my obedience, my growth, my submission, and my pride in being theirs.
Every breath I take is an opportunity to serve them better. In every moment, I ask myself. How can I please them more deeply? How can I lighten their load, bring peace to their world, and reflect the honor of their ownership?
This is the way I live in service, in devotion, in surrender, and in love.
Right now, I’m struggling.
I know the heart of a slave is to serve, to surrender, to find beauty and fulfillment in obedience, but lately, I feel so far away from that. I feel disconnected, like my submission is floating in a space where it is unseen, untouched, and unfelt. And that absence, hurts.
There are things I used to do that made me feel like a slave, kneeling, being at their feet while they ate, the rituals, the tokens of ownership like wearing my collar. Those moments helped anchor me in my identity and my purpose. They weren’t grand gestures; they were small, sacred things that reminded me that I belonged. That I am theirs.
But lately, those rituals have fallen away. And without them, without even a glance, a gesture, a moment where my submission is acknowledged or called on. I feel invisible. Not just as a slave, but as me.
Vanilla and family life have gotten in the way of our dynamic, and my submission.
I want to find meaning, even in the vanilla or everyday things. I truly do. But when those acts aren’t being witnessed, guided, or received by my Masters. When I feel neglected or unseen in the very role that defines my heart, and soul. Even the most well intentioned tasks feel hollow. I don’t want to just do things. I want to be in service, to feel it, breathe it, embody it.
Being blind and having mobility issues adds another layer of struggle. It limits what I can physically do, and often makes it harder to improvise or offer acts of service spontaneously. When I’m not being directed or given structure, I sometimes don’t even know what’s wanted of me, or how to reach for my submission in a way that feels meaningful and not just like going through the motions.
I long to serve. I ache to feel their ownership again. Not just in words, but in ritual, in presence, in intention. I don’t need extravagance. I need connection. I need my Masters.
So I’m still here. Still trying. Still hoping for a return to the small sacred things. So I can once again feel the fullness of what I was made to be.
La Kajira!
Accessible Service Task List
Accounting AssistanceTrack spending in accessible budgeting apps (e.g., Mint, YNAB) or spreadsheets using screen reader friendly formats.
Input receipts using voice dictation or a small portable scanner paired with accessible software.
Use tactile calculators or accessible apps with high contrast, large buttons for manual entry if needed.
Create verbal financial summaries or record voice memos to deliver reports respectfully to your Masters.
Appointment SchedulingUse smart assistant devices (Alexa, Siri, Google Assistant) to set reminders or add events.
Confirm appointments via email or voice call, and organize confirmations by date/time for quick Master reference.
Maintain a shared digital calendar with voice alerts and color coding (if low vision is present).
Cigar Service
Prepare their SpaceSet up a stable, waist height table or tray near where your Masters will sit.
Use non slip mats or small trays with lips to prevent items from sliding.
Have everything laid out in consistent positions for memory based access.
Present the CigarHold the cigar in both hands, horizontally, and offer it up respectfully (kneeling, standing or seated).
If kneeling is difficult, sit in a respectful posture, perhaps on a cushion, with hands lifted in offering.
Use a velvet lined tray or cloth for presentation if holding isn’t an option.
Cutting the Cigar (if permitted or asked)Use a cigar cutter with tactile grips.
Place a tactile sticker or Braille marker on the cutter for proper finger placement.
Practice a steady, confident cut using audio cues or vibration-based cutters if needed.
Lighting the Cigar (if part of your service)Use a torch lighter with a wide button or adapted trigger.
Anchor your hands by bracing elbows on a table or your thighs for steadiness.
Rotate the cigar slowly at the foot, using scent and heat as cues for even lighting.
If direct lighting is too difficult, ask permission to “warm the cigar” instead, holding it to the flame for them.
Offering the Lit CigarPresent the cigar gently in cupped hands or on a tray.
Use a spoken phrase of offering, such as: “Your cigar is prepared, my Master.”
Wait respectfully, listening for any additional requests.
During SmokingSit or kneel in a comfortable position nearby, quietly attentive.
Offer light service if appropriate, hand massage, shoulder touch, or simply peaceful presence.
Have an ashtray with a raised edge and tongs or grabber nearby for assistance if needed.
Post Smoke Clean UpUse gloves or tongs to safely dispose of the cigar stub.
Wipe the tray and lighter area with pre moistened wipes (tactile wipes for easier grip).
Store tools in labeled or Braille tagged containers in consistent places.
Closing the RitualEnd with a submissive gesture or phrase of gratitude, such as, "“Thank You, my Master, for the honor of this service."
Return to your resting position or await further instructions with calm presence.
Clean the S&M ToolsUse tactile labels or raised symbols to identify each tool.
Set up a cleaning station with organized bins and disinfectants with pump tops or squeeze bottles.
Use gloves with textured grip for better handling and use audio reminders for soak/rinse times.
Clothing PrepLay out their outfitsUse Braille or tactile tags in clothing to identify colors, textures, and styles.
Organize their wardrobe in a consistent layout (e.g., tops on left, bottoms on right, formal in center).
Use a chair or bed surface at waist height for easy reach when laying out outfits.
Communication RelayRead or relay messages between House members (as directed) with grace and discretion.
Keep logs of communications or requests using voice memos.
Practice formal speech or respectful tone when delivering messages as a service.
Daily Note Taking or Journaling on their BehalfWrite dictated notes or letters.
Organize notes into categories (business, personal, creative ideas) for easy retrieval.
Record meetings or ideas using a digital recorder if typing isn’t comfortable.
**First Girl Duties – House Leadership Role
Coordinate Task CompletionEnsure all assigned tasks are being completed to House standards and in the time expected.
Offer support, reminders, or redirection if a task is incomplete or done improperly.
Document Training ProgressMaintain records (written or audio) of each slave’s progress, behavior, and growth.
Submit regular reports to Masters Calvin and Damon, as requested.
Facilitate Lesson SchedulesAssist in creating or reinforcing lesson plans tailored to each slave’s development goals set by the Masters.
Keep track of their completion and mastery of each lesson or protocol.
Handle Peer Conflicts or IssuesAddress any personal or emotional issues among slaves when possible, with calm and respectful guidance.
Escalate to the Masters only when necessary or beyond your scope of authority.
Monitor Protocol AdherenceObserve that all slaves are following House protocols correctly and consistently.
Gently correct and guide them when needed, always reflecting the tone of the House.
Offer Mentorship and EncouragementProvide emotional support, submissive encouragement, and mentorship to junior or newer slaves.
Share insights and model appropriate service behavior with humility and pride.
Oversee Training SessionsLead or supervise training sessions as instructed by the Masters.
Use adapted teaching tools if any slaves have special needs (visual, physical, emotional, etc.).
Report to Masters RegularlyDeliver clear and honest updates on slave behavior, achievements, and needs.
Ask for clarification or permission if unsure how to handle a situation.
Gift or Errand PlanningKeep a running voice note list of important dates or needed items.
Assist with online shopping using accessibility friendly websites and tools like screen magnifiers or readers.
Suggest thoughtful ideas based on past preferences, and organize delivery or pickup.
Grocery or Task List KeeperUse voice to text apps (like Notes or Reminders).
Record notes aloud if typing isn’t accessible, and sync to shared devices if needed.
Ask Masters for verbal updates or approval on lists, keeping it collaborative.
House Rules or Protocol DocumentationType or record updated protocols, rules, or rituals using accessible document software.
Store them on a shared drive or voice accessible app for all House members.
Create a “daily protocol audio” reminder or affirmations list if Masters wish to reinforce rituals consistently.
JournalingUse a digital voice recorder, speech to text app.
Keep entries organized by date for easy reference.
If sharing with Masters, email transcriptions or read aloud during a service check in.
LaundryUse Braille or tactile dots on washer/dryer controls.
Pre sort laundry into labeled bins (lights, darks, delicates) to simplify steps.
Sit on a stool or chair while folding to reduce strain.
Light Hand, Foot, or Shoulder MassageUse scented oils or lotions to identify areas by smell if needed.
Learn and memorize a few simple massage patterns for confidence and flow.
Sit on a stable stool or use a lap pillow for support, especially for feet or shoulders.
Use gloves
Put food on platesUse a sectioned plate or plate guard for easier food arrangement.
Use finger guides to portion food neatly, or learn to plate by touch and texture.
Sit while preparing or serving to conserve energy and maintain control.
Secretary ServiceTake voice notes or transcribe messages using speech to text apps (like Otter.ai or Google Docs with dictation).
Organize emails, calendars, and reminders using accessible tools like screen readers (JAWS, NVDA, VoiceOver).
Read important messages aloud (if permitted), summarize tasks, and keep Masters informed daily or weekly.
Use tactile folders or digital file structures labeled by sound or speech commands for efficient access.
Serve DrinksUse a liquid level indicator to avoid over pouring.
Pre measure drink mixes or keep labeled bottles in consistent spots.
Use a tray with non slip liner and handles for safe carrying, or serve seated.
Supervising ThingsUse voice controlled smart home devices to monitor tasks or routines.
Ask for verbal reports or use shared digital calendars/reminders to stay involved.
Give check ins verbally if others are carrying out physical tasks under your direction.
Take Toby PottySit in a chair and wait for him.
Leave the back door open so he can come in whenever he is finished.
Get Masters if I need assistance.
Weekly Check InsPrepare notes or voice memos ahead of time to stay organized.
Sit in a comfortable, supported space with minimal distractions.
Focus on your thoughts, progress, and how you can better serve, be open and honest.
Wipe Down SurfacesUsing pre moistened disinfectant wipesUse wipes with strong texture to feel coverage.
Use a zigzag or circular motion pattern to ensure full wipe down.
Pre label surfaces or use memory and consistency for routine:Bathroom sinks – Start at faucet, move outwards.
Kitchen counters – Start at one corner, move linearly.
Tabletops – Use tactile edge to guide direction.