Breaking up is rough. Breaking up in a dynamic that you thought was going well is even harder. A couple of days ago, Miss broke up with me, not because I did anything wrong but because she didn't have time time to give me anymore.
I'm not gonna lie and say I took it gracefully, I felt used and hurt. Most of all I felt betrayed. I trusted her and she essentially disregard me. I said some not nice things but most of all I cried. I sobbed whilst trying to comfort myself realising that I no longer have a Miss. The worst part of it all is the fact that I had fallen for her, I was falling in love with her. But now she's gone, and I have to come to terms with the fact that she's no longer my miss.
I was finally feeling confident in our dynamic, I felt safe and loved and all that has now been essentially thrown away. I feel like the rug has been pulled out from under me and I'm just free falling. Whilst our relationship ended on a painful note I'm always gonna have a spot for her in my heart as my first Domme.
I need to figure out how to cope and how to thrive when all the guidance and love I once had is gone. I think I'm gonna take a break and just try to clear my head but I just feel rough. It definitely doesn't help that I have the flu right now, because I feel extra rough since I'm physically unwell.
Miss if your reading this, I know you didn't mean to hurt me, but you did. I know in time I can forgive you but right now I need to just focus on myself and my own health. You're always gonna have a place in my heart as the person who showed me that I'm a Little, and who bought so much joy to my life.
I'm torn between dropping off of this site till I feel better or just leaving the site fully. I feel somewhat broken inside but I know that this is only going to be temporary pain.
I'll probably come back eventually but I just need some space.