My Journey finding my dream daddy dom

Today I have time for a quick reader digest on life. I went to celebrate my grandmother's 90th birthday in New York. It rained mostly and didn't get the chance to do serious shopping like I thought I would. Mostly stayed in doors and ate a lot of take out. The huge van that my father rented was too cramped and three voluptious women with 3 little kids and a dog makes one cramped and uncomfortable 36 hour ride back home. My period started and I crave to be fucked constantly. I can only describe it as this eternal blaze burning me from inside out like this mating heat screaming at me to spread my legs and bend over. Next month I will be making my brother's birthday dinner since the budget for going out to dinner was mainly spent on good take out. I created the menu and just need to execute it. I am paying my youngest brother to help out the entire month of June. I hope it inspires him to want to get a job. He is 30 years old and still has not worked once in his life. I want to also plan out my birthday for July. I have this neon pink fishnet body suit and blue strappy bra and panties set. I was thinking of going to an adult sex club or party just dance for those hungry sex deprived men. Until one of them is brave enough to bend me over and ravage me, I also have to plan for the girls at my work a day to do goat yoga. I would love to see if i can get a goat as a pet afterwards. Probably not but it something i would love. 

9:09pm

May 6, 2026

Today I celebrated my brother's thirtieth birthday. We went to the movies to watch Monty Python movie. I fell asleep for most of the movie. Before we went to the movies, we tried getting snacks to smuggle into the movies. Unfortunately, the only one who bought snacks was me. I opted for gummies. After the movies, we went to steak & shake for tater tots and fries. Our mom was near by and picked us up after we got the food. Then our dad came home and we went to the restaurant called Tin Whiskey. The food was very good and filling. We participated in a trivia game and won fourth place just ten dollar gift card for the restaurant. Our dog was not a fan of us leaving her alone in the house and gave us sassy hell for it, but was quickly won over with food. I have a week and a half to get ready for New York trip to celebrate my grandmother's hundredth birthday. I want to do something special for her big day, but I don't know what exactly to give her for her birthday. I better get some sleep. Good night.

Today I am so happy to consider myself in the minorities. So we had a pot bellied  white man (we will call him Kevin for time sake) come into the store. He came to check out and when I was at the register. He looked at me with disgust and said he wanted a white person checking him out. We got another cashier and said he could check him out. He looked at him for one second and then says I want a straight white person to check him out. The male cashier was about to get mad but we had a mind reading link moment and let me resolve it. I called another white male cashier and told him to pretend to be straight then go back to his fabulous self at the end of the transaction. He comes up and checks out the guy out. During the transaction, Kevin is sharing his colorful beliefs . After the transaction is over, Kevin wishes him a great day and the male cashier says in his gayest voice ever " have a fabulous day, queen" . You would of thought that we stole Kevin's money. He went pale as ghost. We fell out laughing and Kevin leaves to complain to the manager and which happens to be Hispanic and gay. So Kevin leaves. I would love to get an answer to this million dollar question. You made a fool yourself already, why not just take the "L" and just keep it moving? The only thing that was hurt is your pride and ego. Don't worry it hurts for awhile, it will last a few moments it is not permanent. Kevin didn't get that lesson. Instead Kevin brings his wife ( we will call her Diana for time sake). She is looking for the manager and the cashier that checked her husband out. She is raising Cain and then approaches the new hire (we will call her Marilyn for time sake). Marilyn has worked for us a couple of months and Diana is invading Marilyn's space by hurling insults and slurs to Marilyn who happens to be Asian descent. Marilyn tells Diana multiple times to back up because she felt threatened. Diana made the mistake to put her hands on Marilyn. Before I could call security . Marilyn grabs Diana's arm and just flips her and body slams her on the carpeted floor. Diana is out cold. Security finally comes and Kevin is carrying his unconscious wife out of the store. I look like a nut jumping up and down laughing. I was fist pumping the air chanting " Yay, Minorities rule!" Marilyn looks at me and says that i must have a lot of pent up dissatisfaction in me. I agreed with her. Like this is the prime example of why it is better to take your lumps and keep it moving versus clowning out and getting knocked out. I had to share that with my Cage family.

Today was a quick work shift. We were giving breakfast and are super pumped for the events being hosted at our store. Including the sip and stroll event. I prefer the Lancome skincare masterclass but that is just me. i ordered pizza once I got home and bought snacks after the work shift. It is very dangerous for me to buy things when I am hungry. As usual when I ask my brothers about their day, they give me generic answers to me or start up don't care to tell me anything. I tell them about my day and get the usual brush off. I didn't have a chance to talk to Aiken; due to the fact I had to open the store that morning. I am getting a few hints about him that gets me to think seriously about him. One of them happens to be the repetive same questions that he asks that I already answered or repeated information that Ialready received. I am also noticing that Aiken sometimes sounds like a teenager with his "or what" at the end of his sentences sometimes or the tone gives off a younger male vibe.  He also is eagered to start training me and collar me without us meeting or establishing solid trust. I want to be serious with him and I deeply desire him so much. My cunt gets so excited when i talk about him or even think about him. it gets lonely sometimes when you look at the special treasure box i bought when I was in my teens. I bought a bdsm sex kit since I wanted to test the equipment on myself to see if I liked it or not. I know i enjoyed the bondage tape, ball gag, blindfold and the restraints was something I loved the most. The rope was nice feel to it but never fully able to test it. I really want to get handcuffs and maybe a better toy for my cunt. I want to try new sensations from different toys. I better get some sleep, I open the store again tomorrow.

     Today i went grocery shopping and still couldn't find rainbow trout fillets but found the rest of the stuff I was looking for.  I finally cooked off my cornish hens and it was very good. My zucchini gratin was peppery which is my fault. I almost dropped the pepper all over the floor but just mostly spilled in the baking dish.  The marshmallow cheesecake was very delicious and as usual. i get little to no feedback on my cooking. I get insulted by them and and wish i got feedback to be a better cook.

8:23pm

April 29, 2026

Today I washed dishes and received my preordered maple syrup from a small business in Vermont. It is made by wiccans and they make excellent teas as well. I also made a big pitcher of sweet tea. My chickens are looking good but I really feel that I could season it better.  Dry brining is a very long and tedious process especially when the hens will be cooked to feed my hungry brothers. Aiken and I have pleasant conversations today. He suggested a beach date which I accepted. Beach dates are one of my favorite type of dates. It is much much cooler at night and less crowded. Though I can't swim. Just being near the ocean and hearing the sea ascending towards the sand and then descend back into the ocean. He told me about his day and how he is covered in weeds and dirt looking like a wild man. I told him about my fantasy about being abducted by a wild man and having my clothes torn off, my panties torn and being forced bred right on the spot. I was covered in his piss and cum after he was done.  He liked the idea too and hopes to act it out someday. I want to give myself to him completely and feel his cock in me; despite the fact we haven't met yet. Every day that I talk to Aiken it feels like I am just having a conversation to my partner of years rather than days. I am burning a soy wax candle in my room and the smell of sweet berries fill my bedroom. I look at the dep blue strappy bra and panties that I still have stored in the third drawer of my plastic drawers. I hope Aiken could teach me how to ride the horses he cares for and maybe help me learn to garden with horse manure. It is very effective fertilizer to grow plants. I really hope to grow a cherry blossom tree or at least a peach blossom tree. I love flowers especially cherry blossoms. They are my favorite. I guess that is why I chose the name for myself.

Today was interesting to say the least. Aiken and I agreed to take bonding to each other seriously and he is eagered to collar as much as I do. I had to deal with a brothers that stuffed their faces with food earlier while i was preparing the Cornish hens. I also had to do the work of three people at work. Cleaning, doing inventory and putting inventory away. I also had to check out people and suggest products to them. I feel like my head would explode. I hope this bond blossoms into something else entirely. Aiken still does this thing where he repeats himself. Also he told me something funny that happened at his outings. Some idiot got drunk and committed a hit and run on property. Then comes back to the scene of the crime the next day. Thank Heavens no one got hurt.  Cops were called and he was hauled off to jail. If you are going to be a criminal, try be a little bit smarter than the average bear. I wonder how Aiken and I will be able to go on our first date if we live so far away. I hope to have a beach date with him where i wear a bikini and running on the sand with the sound of the ocean crashing to the surface. I can't swim but the ocean below is so beautiful and pure freedom in the water. I better go I open the store tomorrow and need plenty of rest.

8:05pm

April 26, 2026

Today i finally was able to to sweep and clean under the bed. I got the last ingredient for my Cornish hens recipe. i just need twine to tie the legs of the chickens during the marinating period. I haven't talked to Aiken all morning. I assumed he was busy with work. It turns out hanging with friends late at night. I was so happy it wasn't because I did something wrong or just lost interest. It happens to me a lot. Especially with the men that i like very much but not that into me. I changed my status to TAKEN now. I want to pursue this relationship and have no regrets about it. Aiken and I both talked about our fantasies and I kept playing with my cunt. I came so much already at least four times. I desire him so much and i want him to collar me so badly. I just need to take it slow and steady. I know I want him sexually but i have to know thoroughly if he is the type that i can be myself in the vanilla society. Also the type i can marry too. 

Work was chaotic. I had a flood of customers nonstop at the counter. I had an incident with a customer over a refund. I would love to just one day open up a school teaching manners and teaching people how to treat people in public. Especially people that work in hospiality. i bought the twine and light brown sugar for my cornish hens. I bought food from the food truck and it was not the best. I bought a hotdog and it was just subpar at best. The wings smelled really good. I should of had wings. I din't since I ordered them for my brothers. The bbq food truck I wanted to get was closed. I was really hankering the half rack of ribs. Aiken and i are getting along quite well other than this morning. I haven't heard from since. I hope he is ok. I want to be serious with him. He is so kind, intelligent and very patient with me. I am falling in love with him and I want him so badly. Am I crazy? My body aches for attention.The thought of being at a dom's feet and sucking his cock. While my pussy and ass  are getting played with. my back covered in hot soy wax and I am blind folded.

April 24, 2026

9:11pm

Today I had got into an incident with a man because I stopped talking to him while I was doing laundry at the laundromat. So I just finished washing my clothes  and put them in the dryer. As they were drying, I was on my phone watching 5 minute news post. A guy started to sit next to me. He started asking the normal questions and I answered then it started getting personal like if I lived around the area and if I have a man. Then he got creepy when he asked if I was wearing a bra. I told him it was none of his business and was getting up to check my clothes. He then pulls the back of my tank top and pulls me back to the chair and says i am not done talking to you. It happened in the morning so not many people at the laundromat but the two men that were there did nothing. Three woman one of whom was the owner of the place jumped up in my defense and told him not to touch me like that. He then jumps up and gets aggressive with them. The owner took his clothes out of the machine and told him to leave  and he is cursing and hurling insults as he is leaving. They check up on me to see if I am ok. I told them I was ok just in shock. I told Aiken and my little brother this. They both ask if I am ok. I told them yes. My head was ringing earlier so I took tyneol and took a nap. Aiken is being very gentle and careful with me. It is like he is earning my heart. I should get ready for tomorrow since I have to open the store in the morning.