If your response is not "YES/YEAH"- may I borrow your ear? Yes folks, I am talking about enthusiastic consent! I don't care how much you want to do a particular something with someone, if they don't get excited about it-just stop. If they seem uncomfortable-just stop!
Now before the pitchforks get sharpened and the lynch mob comes after me, hear me out! I am too sparkly to want to attack, I mean who wants to clean up all of that glitter? 💖 😂
Early on in this Cage adventure there was one who really wanted to be my Dom. Said all the right things, did all the things that captured my attention. Yet, some things just seemed-well, let's just say they were "off". In talking with other members of the community in chat, I learned to find and trust my voice. I learned that if I didn't want to jump up and say "hell yes" to a certain activity, that I should really take that pause. Feeling pushed into something is not enthusiastic consent. If I don't enthusiastically give my consent, am I really having fun?
My wings grew and I started frequenting the Academy in Cleveland. (Come visit if you are in the area!) I play...hard. I have learned (and am still learning) many lessons, yet keep coming back to the need to listen to my gut when it comes to consent.
I urge you all to listen to your gut. You can even enthusiastically consent to the scary or uncomfortable things (defined differently for each reader I am sure). **Even those who are saying "BUT WHAT ABOUT CNC?"...if you or you partner are not enthusiastically both jumping into that boat together, the same rules still apply.** It's all about finding and trusting the person/people that you choose to play/engage with! Take your time, be choosy. You are worth it!
