The Grump is Here

Not all is what it seems !

Looking in the window you can not see everything just what is available to view.

There's the old saying of " never judge a book by it's cover " and they are wise words but are they always correct ?

No.

Sometimes the book cover is just as good or as bad as the story within. 

As my years advance and life gives me experiences whether I ask for them or not I have find myself learning on a daily basis. 

I learn about myself every day.

I learn about my position in this world every day. 

I have stopped learning in some areas of life through no more interest or I no longer can tell fact from fiction that my sense of well being just tells me directly to not bother especially if it affects my calmness within. 

My calmness that I have worked very hard to get and now maintain I protect with a robustness that to my surprise has offended some,  because I may label myself in here as this or that does not mean it's switched on 24/7 and it's certainly not for others entertainment without the work . 

If I see something in here that sparks my interest there is nothing more disappointing to find out it's all bullshit. 

So some see me as just that, bullshit. Ok it's their free choice to think that as it is mine but don't put a label on unless you are willing to wear it to own it and to understand it otherwise I will call bullshit. 

The title is a reference to a song from my youth that had a funk to it and always gave me a giggle when I heard it.  It's about the ordinary little things in life and how they can bring cheer just by simply being. 

Today my life is full of ups downs and in-betweens and I often look back at how when I was young I was so carefree without working on it. BDSM as I grew older it strangely gave me that carefree feeling. Perhaps it was the knowing how my kinks didn't smoothly fit into society norms that gave me a carefree sense of happiness . I knew I wanted to be the square peg in the round hole from an early age and BDSM gave me the tools to explore myself my mind my feelings beyond any constrictions of society without giving me away so to say. 

When I see a submissive female her body language her eyes looking lost because she has to be in control when all she wants is to let go I get excited knowing she exists. These ordinary things in life can thrill can arouse can make my mind run amok with images of my thoughts.  

I embrace my kinks , my well honed kinks as they fit me like a glove. They recharge my batteries when I'm running low , they provide me comfort when I think of them. I am protective of them , I want to share them and yet I fear them being dismissed or diminished because they could be different or odd or wtf. When I get used as a human dildo like what has happened recently my kinks have difficulty recharging my mind, my contentment levels drop and I begin to not notice the small things the reasons to be cheerful. 

And then there is hope. 

Hope.

Always a door will open .

I just need to push sometimes .

Find the door that will open .

Hope and I will once more find the reasons to be cheerful .. part 3 ! 

Once again I give. 

Once more it's taken from me another bit of my spirit is chipped away. 

Why!

How!

You're a Dom you get everything you want don't you ? 

Surely that's why you're a Dom to get what you want ?

No!

And no , fuck no.

Easter eggs, chocolate, bunnies, baskets and purple 💜 oh how I like to see the little butt plug bunny tail wiggle and wiggle in delighted glee at being given attention .....

Soft and  gentle her bare skin 

My hands glide and slide 

The nape of her neck her chin 

Her moans from within 

Across her shoulders smooth round 

Down her arms her hands open 

I hear once more her sound 

Tones of desires hoping 

Across her belly navel indent 

Whsips of soft hairs tickle me 

Through her body pulses are sent 

As my mouth envolpes her pussy 

I am walking through town minding my garden when something catches the corner of my eye. For a second I think "did I see that ? Nah I didn't , yes yes I did " and I stop in me tracks look back to have a gander and there it is ....the glimpse the fleeting second the chink of broken societal confines. 

She wasn't dressed in a ball gown like, nope, not rocking a power suit ,nope , nor in a weeny tiny bikini nope nope. She was just dressed. Mrs Plain Jane pushing her buggy trying to duck n' dive through the crowd. Yet I saw. I saw what I saw. She had bent down to adjust something in the buggy and in that moment of bending her hoody had risen up slightly and her jeans had stretched downwards at the hem but it was enough to put the spotlight on her bright pink knickers that allowed the  very top of her ass crack to peek out and I had seen it by default by pure accident as it was where I just happened to be looking at the very moment ! 

This millisecond of a flash made me think how much I love the concept of more is less especially when it relates to my kinks my love of BDSM. It told me as if I needed telling how much I enjoy the little details the small moments in BDSM that for me go beyond kink and go into the realm of lightening bolts to my thoughts . 

Quick introduction to me : dyslexic sarcastic Irish Dom very comfortable with my Dom persona and make no apologies , the thin skinned may need to not read !

So as a come and go over the years cage resident I have always been open-minded to talking to all walks of submissive females and indeed those who are dommes who allow themselves talk to me and are not afraid I'll try to get into their knickers ! This attitude I have of I'll talk to you has yielded some cracking conversations some friends some submissives and some filthy feckers giggling like a demon. There then came a thing a trend I began to notice where my chat was becoming shorter on the benefit for both and definitely was beginning to exclude me ! 

Ahh shite I thought I'm just a non battery dildo here to some of the 'submissives' who engage and then get bollicked up knock out one and feck off like fox at a hen house filled and happy out . 

I began to get less energy to chat to find myself as they say pouring from an empty cup . 

Oh I know and I am very aware of the things the protections etc a submissive needs to engage in here in order to be safe and rightly so. So maybe I'm unlucky that the 'submissives' I've started to bump into recently are takers pure joyride takers , get their orgasm and piss off to sleep happy out tensions eased that fecker at work no longer annoying them. 

So my smart arsed attitudes here will probably piss of some but I'm relating my experiences and I'm not sugar coating them to make those offended not cry in outrage. I'm saying I have a lot to offer and taking from me all the time has become tiresome and fuckin made me wary and cautious which I fuckin hate.