For the longest time I’ve had body image issues. Fluctuating the scale. Even had/have an eating disorder. Always the girl with pretty face.
i was drawn to weights at a young age. Got a gift subscription to Muscle and Fitness magazine in jr high by an avid lifter and family friend. He knew i was a power house at a young age. i lifted in High school, the power was amazing. There was just something about picking up the cold solid weights, the clanging of plates on the bar. i could build killer legs with ease.
Time went on and babies were had and i tried to keep up, but life got in the way. I would go on and off with fitness. Then i got the itch again in 2015, committed to Body Beast and got strong, the 19inch calves were back!
i soon slipped off the weight bench, slacked around again, but the love was always there. I met Bishop and he to enjoyed weights also. He always encouraged me to get back into it.
then October of 2024 something kicked back in. i started lifting at home. Bishop got me kettlebells and other item and pushed me back into Body Beast. i slowly began lifting, barely making it 15 min. Then i had a medical issue where my BP skyrocketed, once again my fire began to flicker out.
But i didn’t let it die, i started walking daily at work first a half mile then up to 3 miles a night. At home i set up my area with the new weight Bishop got me in December. i added in Pilates and cardio. i have been consistent now for over 3 months. Each day i lift and stretch. i feel powerful again. i have long way to go before i am where i want to be, by May i hope to have hit a major goal when i turn 50!
it’s a slow and steady process and age plays into it also. But it’s something i need to and want to do.i want to be strong and powerful enough to tackle the world.
Right now I’m in ghost mode to the rest of the world, no one outside of this site knows I’ve been working out, or losing weight, no one. i talk to no one, i wear big comfy winter clothes everywhere i go. No one needs to know. This is my discipline to be a better me and understand my submissive nature. So i share with you all.