*My "Fringe" series is dedicated to to the less known, misunderstood, and often negatively perceived, forms of male submission. I am looking to inform and educate through my own experience, and to defend and support such styles of play. To understand my motivation, please read my prequel post.*
In my experience male cuckholds are the most openly shamed and bullied of the male sub types in the community. Here is my take on the misconceptions that lead to such behavior and maltreatment of cuckholds.
Misconceptions...
*Consenting to a relationship with a "cheating" partner is tantamount to consenting to emotional abuse.
*If a male consents to such "abuse" they must get off on it and would consent to it coming from anyone.
*Males that participate in such relationships must be weak or unable to maintain a relationship of their own.
All of these assumptions are irresponsible and absurd. No one has any business drawing such conclusions and projecting opinions or actions toward a cuckhold based on them. The following is my attempt to explain the kink and how it supports a healthy D/s dynamic.
To understand cuckholds, one must first understand some of the basic ideals of male submission in those that may be attracted to cuckholding. This list is a generalization and is by no means fully inclusive.
*female supremacy/superiority
*male inferiority/personal inferiority
*a desire to serve a female partner in the best possible way
*taking pleasure in the female's pleasure regardless of the source
*attraction to humiliation
*being able to tend to the non-sexual needs
The attraction to humiliation, a relatively common kink in D/s, is an obvious factor for most cuckholds so I won't delve into explaining that aspect. To this day, I have not met a cuckhold that says "Yes, it turns me on knowing my partner is with another man". What is a turn on for them is knowing their female partner is fully sexually satisfied, which the cuck has made possible by allowing it as part of the relationship dynamic. Another common theme is the feeling that the woman should be entitled to whatever she wants from the relationship and the cuck feels a responsibility and obligation to provide that. A cuck may feel sexually incompetent or inferior and happily withdraw from that aspect of responsibility in the relationship, finding more satisfaction in being able to tend to other needs, such as child rearing, bread winning, providing emotional support or tending to the home.
These are just a few examples of motivators for the cuck. The reality is this doesn't look that different from other forms of D/s and given the right conditions can be really healthy for all parties involved. I have mentioned double standards before and this is another example. Dom men often keep multiple partners. Poly couples do the same. There is practicality in this. One partner may not be able to meet all of anothers needs. Perhaps having multiple partners is the need itself. Cuckholding is no different.
From experience, I can share that cuckholds can be some of the most selfless, commited, and loyal partners a woman could ask for and deserve a place at the BDSM table free from shame and mockery.
