We were supposed to be together today.... but life screwed things up and our visit had to be postponed. It was cancelled a few weeks ago, so it wasn’t a surprise, but laying here alone tonight reminds me that I’m supposed to be in His arms instead
It’s no one’s fault but I still want to curl into a ball and cry. I’ve been a little off for the last couple of days. Needy and almost borderline desperate for attention & affection. I can’t always express that so easily to Him so I try to drag it out by asking questions that I Hope will give me answers that make me feel the “warm & fuzzies” that I desperately need right now. It’s not the most healthy of behaviors but I don’t deal well with needing anyone for anything. Being LD gives me less opportunity to lean on Him and using messenger for our primary form of contact, we lose so much subtlety and emotion. Some days I want to pull my hair out when we can’t make the emotional connection that I need.
Demanding much, djinni?!!??
i am, for the most part, a happy and satisfied submissive I am loved & adored, nurtured and brutalized (you get me) suitably... but I need Him I need to be reminded of who I am to Him and why we chose to walk this path. When the nights are long and lonely, all I have are the memories and the anticipation of another visit in a few months I need Him