Discommbobulated

After a few glasses of Cabernet, wetness settled into my panties and I began my journey into the unknown to me BDSM world. I’ve had the desire for many years. When I’ve thought about ropes, leather, spankings, pleasurable pain, and otherwise unacceptable sexual desires, my Catholic upbringing kept me from exploring the BDSM side of me. I’ve participated in many ritualistic prayers, took part in small dark penance rooms where I never divulged my BDSM sins, and attended weekly catechism classes. In my opinion my past religious practices sexually excited me. Even as an adult, my religious upbringing brought me to feel ashamed of my sexual desires, so I stayed in a vanilla lifestyle. Lord, the word vanilla sounds so cliche.  I found this site a few months ago and in the beginning I would browse the site and within ten minutes, I would close my large screened Apple IPAD and felt like I should get on my knees and pray. As I got on my knees I found myself thinking about being vulnerable on my knees getting ready to be sexually punished by a strong yet trusting man. I imagined getting a slight yet firm spanking across my ass with a leather apparatus of his choosing. In my wet imagination, this was my expectation but first encounter on this site was far from this.