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Contemplative musings of a sub.

Honest gut feelings about real issues facing chatters here drawing from what i have been taught and from what i have personally learned.
5 years ago. June 18, 2018 at 3:46 PM

Every so often this question reaches my ears and well its no small point.

But way before it reaches this point a sub can ask questions in the beginning that will give a clear heads up to the personality of the Dominant who is under consideration.

Simply ask the prospective D if they have ever ignored a subs  limit and why.  Now listen very carefully to the answer.

And honestly if they have ignored a limit before chances are they will do it again. And chances are they will do it to YOU.

If you decide to make a go of it with this person you will then risk getting emotionally tangled up with them and well your heart will have a way of complicating all of it.  Then it will be hard for you when you are saying  he repeatedly ignores my limits  but i love Him or Her.

And while we are at it...asking a prospective D  if They have pictures of the forms of play they engage in is valid.  of course be prepared for all kinds of excuses.  but i have a portfolio of hundreds of my play pictures...most of em dont have my face in them.

If the D is still on good terms with the exe subs and the reasons why blah blah dont matter.   pictures taken of their rope work  shared with you wont divulge who that person was.  wont tell you where they live.  someone parting on good terms will have access to pictures of their creative and kinky work to share with you.

and a heads up...someone with pictures that are not home made may not end up being the play partner you fantasize or hope you will find.

if you lower your standards   that is what you are going to get in the end.

Asteria​(neither female) - I have some issues with that question whether a Dominant has ever ignored his (her) sub's limits. It is not the best question, simply because no one who can think a little, will admit that he (or she) actually has ignored them, because usually it is perceived as something that puts paid to Dominant's attempts to get a new submissive.
Also, everything depends on particular limit. We are all just humans and we make mistakes. If a Dominant claims to have 20 years of experience and says he has never made a mistake...
5 years ago
Silver​(sub female){not intere} - alas for many the dialogue needs to start somehow and somewhere. exactly what every individual sub does is up to them. i can only set the table out with food for thought. many can be led to water but will refuse to drink. take what you will of the post.
5 years ago

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