Maybe I’m crazy

1 week ago. Wednesday, May 6, 2026 at 5:56 PM

Life has such a wicked sense of humour. The Divine Comedy. That’s all I could think afterwards.

The irony that I had literally just told my sister that very morning that he and I had finally reached such a beautiful place in our friendship.

“I love you.”

“I want us to get back together.”

Two sentences. And just like that everything changes whether I wanted it to or not.

My stomach dropped.

I love him more than I ever have. But not in that way anymore. As I walked this morning I realised something… at this point in time, peace is more important to me than love. And relationships don’t bring me peace. Yes, it’s a cop out. It takes bravery to let someone close… bravery I just don’t have anymore. I’m tired of being brave. I just want… stillness. Not numbness. I want to revel in life without interruption or disruption. I want to watch sunrises in awe. I want to feel the breeze kiss my cheek. I want to marvel at the birds. I want to cherish the love I am surrounded by… without anything touching my wounds.

Maybe I’m crazy. I spent my whole life doing everything I could just to be in this very moment… ironically in both ways… searching for love and searching for peace. And I never expected to be here if I’m honest. And what’s even more surprising is my choice. I thought it would be love every time.

I remember when, I remember

I remember when I lost my mind

There was something so pleasant about that place

Even your emotions have an echo

Into so much space

And when you're out there

Without care

Yeah, I was out of touch

But it wasn't because I didn't know enough

I just knew too much

Does that make me crazy?

Possibly

Pa pa pa pe

Come on now, who do you

Who do you, who do you

Who do you think you are?

Ha ha ha

Bless your soul

You really think you're in control?

I think you're crazy

And I think you're crazy

Just like me

Pa pa pa pe

Ever since I was little

Ever since I was little and it looked like fun

And it's no coincidence I've come

And I can die when I'm done

Maybe I'm crazy

Maybe you're crazy

Maybe we're crazy

Probably

Pa pa pa pe