There are always growing pains, things we see and understand only later on, connections and wisdom that dawns on us after things have been said or done...
I thought I had met a very special someone and oh how happy it made me inside, that he saw a part of me no one else could see, right from the go it was comfortable and right, and this in itself is so unusual for me...hope blossomed.
Such a short time, so wonderful and magical it still makes me smile, then all of a sudden gone. I would normally wonder what I did wrong, this time however my voice is singing a different tune. I found myself deeply worried and terribly saddened by the thought that I had someone pushed this wonderful charming person into a darkness, triggered something they were fighting, showing them something they weren't yet ready for.
I keep hearing that you attract what you put out there but I can't see how these things are what I'm putting out.
Before we spoke I wanted so much the person that in a day managed to bring out parts of me I never even knew existed. The rational part of me says it has nothing to do with me, but the emotional part is upset that this person might be in a bad place emotionally because of me. If I'd ever had to describe my perfect dom...it would have been him, and now it seems I've gone and done it again. Everyone seems to disappear or evaporate as soon as they start to see me, the real me.
