I've never believed in anything at first sight. It all takes time, even butterscotch sundaes. Things can be pretty, sparkly and magical on the outside but have no substance.
I need to learn and know and grow into something/someone.
For example, I have no interest in an Insta-dom and have no interest in being an Insta-submissive. Those people may find each other and live happily ever after, it's just not me.
For me, I need more. I need a connection on a psychological and emotional level. That's what draws me closer.
That safety, security, confidence, deference and respect drive me.
To whom do I submit? The one who knows me. The one who tries to know me better. The one that pushes boundaries slowly and respectfully; at my pace. The one who has my respect. The one with whom I feel safe and secure to release my desires and his. The one who thrives in his dominance of me and inspires my submission to him
No love at first sight for me. I'll give my submission at long last.