As I sit with myself each day, time passing as it so does. I can feel it. This….longing. Like a deep, pulsing hunger. I’ve been giving myself daily tasks, chores set in place to allow me to challenge myself. As I accomplish each task I set before myself, I find myself still feeling unfulfilled. It wasn’t until last night that I realized….Im holding in my submission.
Like a breath you hold to stop the hiccups, I’m holding in my trust. Keeping the reigns of my submission close to my heart so as not to stumble into a dynamic that snatches my breathe without consent and leaves me bruised and aching in a less than ideal way.
What I failed to realize was how heavy it can get. Shoutout to Doms for carrying it in such an effortless seeming fashion. I hunger to be devoured. I want to prey, to be desired so deeply that they become predator.
The longing is eating at me!