Does anyone else just feel like they need to get out of their own heads for a while. Like you just want to escape. Just to forget the stress, worries, all the important bull crap in our day to day lives. Just to not have to think. All through my now failed marriage I was the always the one who worried, made sure everything was done. Kids, dogs, house, bills, all while going to school full time. That’s what’s expected when you grow up, get married and have kids. It was fine, except I never had an escape, a way to release anything. A fault of my own, none the less. Sex, even vanilla, was rare. I’m talking twice a year. I’m not a drinker or done drugs. Sure I’ve done them in my past but you grow up, at least most do. My only vice is cigarettes. I know it’s a bad one, but I’ve cut back with the intent to quit. So with this new journey I’m on of finding myself, forgiveness, and becoming a better version of myself. I vow to find a hobby, a healthy hobby. Maybe running, I’ve always found it cathartic. I have to focus on my breathing at first so that I don’t get a cramp and then once I get into a rhythm my mind goes blank. My fastest 2 miles was 15:25. Maybe I’ll try to beat that, though it’ll take a while as I haven’t ran consistently since I left AD in 2017. I also used to free write as a teen. I’d start out writing about literally nothing, random words. By the end of a couple pages it all made sense and my brain fog was clear. I’m rambling, maybe that’s what I’m doing here. Anyway if this makes sense to you then thanks for reading 😂😂
HW 💜
