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6 months ago. November 2, 2023 at 1:58 AM

Today was a writing day for the most part.  This morning, I was working on a chapter that begins with a main character's death. Often I find music can help me find my way back to a character and scene.  So this morning the song Eyes Closed was on repeat. I could very much identify with the whole idea seeing someone in everything.  The chapter is therapy, the book is too.  There is a disbelief that comes with loss.  Accepting the finality of loss.. And well killing one of the main characters was therapy in itself. (evil laughter)

So song:

Lyrics:

Eyes Closed

I know it's a bad idea
But how can I help myself?
Been inside for most this year
And I thought a few drinks, they might help
It's been a while, my dear
Dealin' with the cards life dealt
I'm still holdin' back these tears
While my friends are somewhere else
I pictured this year a little bit different when it hit February
I step in the bar, it hit me so hard, oh, how can it be this heavy?
Every song reminds me you're gone, and I feel the lump form in my throat
'Cause I'm here alone
Just dancin' with my eyes closed
'Cause everywhere I look, I still see you
And time is movin' so slow
And I don't know what else that I can do
So I'll keep dancin' with my
Eye-eye-eye-eyes
Eye-eye-eye-eyes closed
Eye-eye-eye-eyes
So I'll keep dancin' with my-
Delusion is here again
And I think you'll come home soon
A word brings me right back in
Then it's only me that's in this room
I guess I could just pretend
The colours are more than blue
But I lost more than my friend
I can't help but missin' you (yeah, yeah, yeah)
I pictured this month a little bit different, no one is ever ready
And when it unfolds, you get in a hole, oh, how can it be this heavy?
Everything changes, nothing's the same, except the truth is now you're gone
And life just goes on
So I'm dancin' with my eyes closed
'Cause everywhere I look, I still see you
And time is movin' so slow
And I don't know what else that I can do
So I'll keep dancin' with my
Eye-eye-eye-eyes
Eye-eye-eye-eyes closed
Eye-eye-eye-eyes
So I'll keep dancin' with my
Eye-eye-eye-eyes
Eye-eye-eye-eyes closed
Eye-eye-eye-eyes
Oh, I keep dancin' with my-
They're shutting the bar, they're cleanin' the floor, and everyone is already home
But I'm on my own
Still dancin' with my eyes closed
'Cause everywhere I look, I still see you
Time is movin' so slow
And I don't know what else that I can do
So I'll keep dancin' with my
Eye-eye-eye-eyes
Eye-eye-eye-eyes closed
Eye-eye-eye-eyes
Oh, I keep dancin' with my
Eye-eye-eye-eyes
Eye-eye-eye-eyes closed
Eye-eye-eye-eyes
Oh, I keep dancin' with my-

Songwriters: Max Martin / Ed Sheeran / Shellback / Fred Gibson


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