Sole Worship: Desire, Symbolism, and Ritual in Kink

Most of us like shoes to some extent. You might like the way they fit into your style, or you might love how they elevate an outfit. When you look at others wearing shoes, you might love how they elongate their legs or the extra inches it adds to their height.

For some people, though, the appeal is all in the shoe itself.

Some people have a shoe fetish.

What Types of Shoes are Fetishists Into?

Shoe fetishists are just as varied as bondage lovers; the exact "method" they're into is going to vary from person to person.

Some people are really into sneakers. While you've seen those stores that sell luxury athletic shoes for collectors, these people are into the shoes for other reasons. In many cases, this is a learned response for these fetishists as people they were attracted to always seemed to wear this type of shoes.

Others are really into high heels. Wearing, or seeing someone else wear, high heels just does it for them. As high heels are sexualized in our average day-to-day lives, this fetishization usually goes "above and beyond" the standard appreciation. They may feel aroused handling or seeing a high heel that meets their kink standard.

Going the other direction, some people may really be into combat boots. Like athletic shoes, this may be a learned response; the hotties into punk and goth aesthetics might have trained them into it or they've had really erotic experiences with boots in motorcycle or leather communities. Seeing a well-used pair of laced-up combat boots might just "do it" for them.

Sandals or flip-flops are also a common target. This has some overlap with foot fetishism as many people into these open-air footwear choices simultaneously love how they frame the foot. (It's kinda like lingerie for a foot, if you think about it...)

Even more specific, some shoe fetishists are only into specific materials or brands for their shoes. For combat boot fetishists, for example, fake leather might be a complete turn off. Their combat boots must be made of genuine leather as the feet, smell, and taste of real leather is different than other materials. Athletic shoe kinksters might be really into one brand but turn their nose up at the idea of an athletic shoe from a different brand.

Why Do People Have a Shoe Fetish?

The reasons people have a shoe fetish are just as variable as the types of shoes that people are into. As always, everything about our sexualities are personal to us, and the reason that one person falls in love with shoes may not be the same reason someone else falls in love with shoes.

However, a conditioned response is a common reason for finding yourself with a shoe fetish. During impressionable periods in your life, someone you were attracted to wore a specific type of shoes. Your first crush might have always worn a specific style of sneakers. Maybe the "popular girls" group always wore flip-flops to school every day. Your first boyfriend, who you had an intense relationship with, may have been a "combat boots" guy. Over time, during these impressionable periods, your brain started to associate these footwear choices with arousal, and you can find yourself with a targeted shoe kink.

Other people, however, will say that they think they were born with it. Some of their earliest memories, long before puberty or having "sexual" thoughts, were focused on people's shoes and people's feet.

On the other side, some kinky people haven't spent years fantasizing about the shoes themselves, but they may find themselves into shoes now that shoes "represent" something to them. Shoes and feet are the lowest part of a person. From a power exchange standpoint, being forced to worship (or lie underneath) the lowest, "dirtiest" part of a person can feel extremely submissive. For kinksters like these, they may not care about the brand or style of the shoes themselves - just that they're being forced underneath them.

What About Bootblacking? Is That Shoe Fetishism?

It's important to note that bootblacking isn't necessarily related to a shoe or boot fetish. Some bootblacks do have a kink for the shoes that they're shining, but many do not.

Not sure what bootblacking is? Bootblacking is the ritualized care of leather gear within BDSM spaces. A bootblack, who prides themselves on their knowledge and ability to care for leather gear, will partner up with someone who is wearing leather gear. In most kink scenes, the person receiving bootblacking services will wear their gear while the bootblack shines it, giving an intimate, personal touch to the experience. Most bootblacks have a headspace they'll get into, and providing this service - and receiving the energy exchange with the person in their bootblacking chair - is a scene to itself.

(Bootblacking exists outside of kink spaces as well! Out in the everyday world, though, it's a service you can pay for to care for expensive shoes.)

While bootblacking focuses a lot on shoes, and some bootblacks do have shoe fetishes, many bootblacks are there for the act itself. Caring for someone else's gear can have an intimate, thoughtful vibe to it. In a day and age where "fast fashion" is the norm, taking a half an hour to caress, clean, and shine a piece of gear can feel relaxingly...slow. Partner that with the feeling of making another person happy, and quite a few bootblacks are there for the service itself - not necessarily for the opportunity to touch or ogle a pair of boots. (Though that does happen too!)

Ways to Explore a Shoe Fetish

Do you think you might have a shoe fetish? Maybe you know your partner does, and you're looking for new ways to play.

If that's the case, there are some easy ways to explore the world of shoe fetishism:

• Scenes and sex in shoes. It's the easiest trick in the book. If you're turned on by seeing or wearing shoes, simply wear them during the activities you were already going to do. If high heels are in the equation, ensure your scene plans for the risk of the uneven balance they require.
• Utilize extra-intense shoes. We all have shoes that are "everyday average" shoes, and we have "extra" shoes. Consider "forcing" your partner into these above-the-top shoes. For heels, that might be ballet boots. For athletic shoes, that might be an extra-expensive, rarely-worn pair of sneakers. Simply wearing something above-and-beyond can instantly put it on a pedestal that's hard to forget during play.
• Doing things with your feet while wearing them. You don't necessarily have to focus on the shoe itself; you can simply use your foot on their body while wearing the shoes. Lightly "step" onto a seated partner's thigh while issuing a command. If you're seated and the fetishist is at your feet, place your feet on their shoulders as an impromptu footrest. Use your shoe-clad feet as gentle impact play toys, giving gentle kicks with your feet if that's within your consented scene plan.
• Strap-on harnesses for boots. If your shoe fetishist is in it for the boots, consider purchasing a strap-on harness just for your shoes. These harnesses allow you to strap a dildo onto the top of a shoe, letting any shoe fetishist (or just someone who likes the vibe!) to "literally" ride your boot. Boots tend to be most-often used with these harnesses as their flat surface can make them easier to clean up afterwards.
• Oral shoe worship. Making someone get on their knees and orally appreciate your shoes can be hot. Just remember that there's a lot of germs and bacteria on your shoes from day-to-day wear. This can be a great excuse to make someone clean your shoes ahead of time, or you can simply ignore the grime. It's up to you and what the lick-ee agrees to.
• Shoe gags. If you're someone who enjoys the smell of well-used shoes, some kinky people have designed shoe harnesses that will literally strap a shoe onto someone's face. Every breath they take will be of the inside of the shoe.

Some kinksters will also take it further. For some, part of the appeal of their shoe fetish is "ruining" something that was so arousing, perfect, and functional in the first place. For others, they simply want to enjoy their kink to the fullest, and they're not concerned if it ruins the shoe in the process. This can become an expensive way to play, though, so I'm including these play ideas, which may ruin your shoes in the process, as a separate list:

• Masturbate off with the shoes – used or otherwise. Shafts can slide inside of – and against the sole of – a shoe to get off. Vulvas can grind up against the front of a shoe. If you're into shoes like this, getting off with the shoe can be extremely intense.
• Cum on the shoes. For some people, the turn-on is, quite literally, the shoe itself. They may not necessarily need someone to wear it. For that, cumming directly on the shoe can be a quick turn-on.
• Don't clean the cum off the shoes. After cumming on shoes, most people might attempt to clean the shoes. Some, however, find it hot if the cum is just allowed to dry on the shoes, sticking around for multiple "loads". The visual of a constantly-used, stained shoe is part of the appeal.
• Shoejobs. Just like a footjob, you can slide a shaft in-between two shoes to "thrust" until you get enough stimulation to orgasm. This requires lots and lots of lube, and depending on the shoe, this can take your shoes to an early retirement. Not all shoes will be viable for this; some shoes with rough, rigid edges may feel more painful than pleasurable on the side of a shaft.

Is Your Shoe Fetish Healthy?

While we often use "fetish" and "kink" interchangeably in everyday dialogue in BDSM communities, it's really important to note there's a difference when talking about an attraction to physical objects.

A fetishistic disorder, as described by psychological association's disorder diagnostic criteria, involves recurrent, intense sexual arousal from a non-living object for over at least six months. As a fetishistic disorder, it will cause significant distress or impairment in relationships or everyday functioning. In many cases, the person will not be able to achieve sexual arousal without the fetish object being present or a focal point of the sexual play.

As you can imagine, this can be extremely stressful for someone or their partner, and it's important to highlight here as shoes are often the focus object of fetishistic disorders.

However, it's important, again, to note: classification as a fetishistic disorder requires significant distress or impairment in relationships or everyday functioning. If you have a shoe fetish you're happily incorporating in sex play and otherwise having a grand ol' time, have at it! A fetishistic disorder likely doesn't apply to you.

If you're experiencing issues in everyday life over your love of shoes, though, know that this happens often, and you may want to talk to a professional.

Mistress Kay lives in the world of sexuality and kink. With a house that's quickly running out of space for things that aren't sex books and sex toys, she spends what free time she has writing femdom help articles ( http://kinky-world.net/category/bdsm-advice/femdom-advice/ ), trying the latest and greatest in sex toys, and exploring the sexual universe with her partners. She can be reached at https://kinky-world.net/ .

All THE CAGE Magazine articles, including this one, were written without the use of AI.