How did you find your first Mistress ?

How did you find your first Mistress ?

Slave Dougy​(sub male){No Collar } • May 27, 2019

Mine is a very twisted story of a quest. MORE TO FOLLOW

MissBonnie​(dom female){oz} • May 28, 2019

I love reading people stories. Looking forward to the replies

Part 1

Slave Dougy​(sub male){No Collar } • May 28, 2019

    Early in my relationship with my girlfriend (Cathy) she explained to me that she had been taken advantage of young in life and therefore I came to realize that she would not be a good person to explore any alternate lifestyles with but I didn't want to leave her as she had no where else to go. <br>
   So I chose to join a swinger's website on my own. I searched for a couple that was willing to form a threesome with a me and hoped someday I might get my girlfriend to consider it. <br>
    I tried for weeks to connect with little to no  success. Then one day, out of nowhere and without my initiating contact I received a brief message saying "Our membership is about to end.  Text me at......" . I looked up the profile and read all the details. Main take away was that he wants to watch someone fuck his very horny girlfriend. Maybe he would join in, maybe not.<br>
    I texted him. He identified himself as Tim. He explained again that he wanted to watch and his girlfriend was into it but wanted to interview me before we would even meet. <br>
   A few days later they texted in a joint text string. They (Tim & Tara) asked some basic  questions and I answered. They lived a few hours away and was on my way to one of my frequently visited destination. <br>
  Based on this interaction they decide that Tara would interview me online privately. In that talk we covered many topics that people on a first date cover. Things like where you grew up, what you do for a living, parents, siblings, previous relationships which led to us talking about the deaths of our beloved spouses. Up to this point I think we were hitting it off but with this last topic we really bonded hard.  MORE TO FOLLOW

How I found my Mistress

Belongs2Huntress​(sub gender fluid){Collared} • Sep 17, 2019

One night while having drinks with a friend of mine. We were sitting at the kitchen table joking and laughing about vanilla dating sites. She eventually convince me to do a profile for a large vanilla site. The profile I came up with was very unwelcoming. The next day I got a message from a nice young lady who saw my pic but didn't read my profile. By chance she a very kinky Dom looking for a sub. There's a lot more to this story but to make it short we've been living together for well over a year.

Interesting

Amazoni​(dom female){Yes} • Oct 31, 2019

I find this topic very interesting. I like witnessing the journey to surrender.

alex1940​(sub male) • Oct 31, 2019

the first mistress that too me on from a aid meet her we talk and said come back next week so i do come back she did a few thing to me and she said you will be a very good sub that was 15 years ago she pass away that is why i am looking for another age size race is all ok with me i am in north new jersey i am black man thank you sub alex 1940

Re: Part 1

KarmaCollar​(dom female) • Nov 21, 2019

I know your experience traveled a great distance from this point but there is one thing I'd like to come back to and point out: For some women (myself included) early sexual abuse does not make them/us opposed or afraid of sexual exploration. I have found retaking control of the situation to be VERY therapeutic and it helps knowing this is something a man WANTS and not me repeating an abuse on someone new. Don't rule anyone out for anything, really, is what I'm saying. And while it's always hard/emotional/awkward to approach these issues, it may be a truly healing factor once initiated (or even giving her the option of closure by giving a hard-stop NO).

Duke Montefort​(dom male) • Nov 21, 2019

1.(college) I was taken to a S&M club in Baltimore. I found a quieter spot when an elderly lady dressed in a suit. She spoke to me offering for me to enter under her service as a high priest eunuch. I would become her slave and she would make me a powerful figure in a female led community. I politely declined.
2.(college) A random woman and her friend walked up to me at a college library while I was reading. She placed a collar and leash around my neck. She declared me her property to her friend. She had long blond hair. I tore the collar off and fled the nut.
3. (grad school) I had a girlfriend, and She and her friend decided I was a submissive. Without a contract or discussion with me. They decided to train me. I was called and they demanded to be taken to Walmart. I politely agreed. My girlfriend was rude and demanding. Her friend mostly watched and laughed. While I was driving she changed my radio station and turned the music so loud I couldn't drive. We argued over it, and I turned off the radio. We arrived at Walmart where she demanded I pay for her things. (My money is my money, and your money is my money) I refused. When we returned to her apartment she told me I was disobedient and I would be punished. She attempted to spank me, but I sat down. Then she attempted to kick me in the testicles. I however caught her leg, and knocked her and myself on the ground. After a short wrestling match.


Afterwards, I became a dominant rather then submit to such terrible leadership. These are the most civil experiences I've had.

SchrodingersDinosaur​(switch female){N/a} • Nov 21, 2019

@Duke Montefort, Although like many of us, I detest the use of the word 'real' in regards to anyone in our world, your comments above beg it. None of those women were 'real' Dommes. In your first example the woman was almost without question a fantasist. I'm sure you are a very attractive and pleasant person to talk to in person but anyone who has risen to a level of prominence in an organization like she described doesn't pick up her number one eunuch (wouldn't that have been cool on a business card though!) by meeting some rando at a dungeon. Although it might make a cool storyline for the writers among us. I'd wager she was playing a little unilateral RP with you.

Two and three were noobs/ wannabes. Cut from the same cloth as the silly boys who show up in the ladies' inboxes here saying 'Kneel Bitch, you are now my slave'. Uh no, doesn't work like that, nor does it work in the two instances you related above. Ergo, they were all unrepresentative of Dommes as a whole. Thinking you and the other real Doms here on the Cage don't care for it when subbie ladies assume all Doms are arrogant jerks after a few interactions with the sharks and other idiots. Dommes may occasionally be a little demanding or brusque or even...ahem...bitchy, but the good ones take negotiation, consent, and our Lifestyle in general, seriously. None of the described ladies above did.

I'm hope the final statement you made was for emphasis or hyperbole. Assuming a particular role really should be about what you feel inside, not because you happened upon some of the faux. The argument is the same as when we comment about the newbie Doms who suddenly turn subbie thinking it might be more likely to get them some action when they find they are striking out with the Dom angle. You should be who you are because it's who you are, not because of some of the people you've happened upon in the opposing role left a bad taste in your mouth.

Just Henna's two cents, though...

Duke Montefort​(dom male) • Nov 22, 2019

I do not recognize myself as attractive or engaging. However, she engaged me not because of my looks, but my knowledge and skill set. I have knowledge only a few can understand. How to start and keep a religion without it spiraling out of control. The first hundred years are critical. Extremes can quite literally destroy them. As a religious historian I've studied it extensively. Secondly, you must understand her deity and faith is my demonic lifeform. Thirdly, I was young and a virgin in her faith very valuable. This was a theological, business, and political move on her part. Sex had nothing to do with it or at most only a little. Your sub culture is part of a larger complex formation then simply sex. I followed a friend to the club. She followed me, and our discussion was a lengthy one.