Anal

My Dear​{Trust} • Jul 12, 2020

Also, Spit is NEVER a substitute for lube!!

WickedDom​(dom male) • Jul 12, 2020

I can count on one hand how many times I've had a potential tell me she likes anal. Nearly all tell me they hate it. However after discussing, I usually learn they hate it because of a bad experience. More often than not they got drunk with an old boyfriend or significant other was pressured into trying. You should do it because you want to do it.

What I do, I buy a set of anal plugs and lube. Always use lots of lube! The plugs range in size from a small on about the size of a thumb to one that's the size of a small dick. I don't put a time frame on them, just have them start with the smallest and plug when they can. They usually work their way up to the biggest and once they are taking the biggest then I tend to know they are ready to try the real thing. Most find they enjoy anal sex when it's done right. So, if your having some discomfort. Try a small plug. Work with it. Never push too hard, if it hurts take the night off. Don't rush it, and you find yourself not wanting to do it, then stop. As I said, do it because you want to do it. It will be better for you and him. However, if you keep it up, you'll be able to use the plug more and more and the pain will go away. When that happens start with a marginally larger plug and do the same thing. Rinse and repeat until you're taking the biggest plug. You'll be taking your bf not long after, and sounds like you might enjoy it.

annabellestasia​(sub female) • Jul 12, 2020

Get a really powerful vibrator and use it to distract the initial pain from that area! I think with this type of penetration, it’s mind over matter until it’s “in” and then it’s honestly so good. As long as you hold that vibrator as a distraction & use A TON of lube ?

Re: Anal

tallslenderguy​(other male) • Jul 13, 2020

What is it about anal that you "hate? " i think answering that is key to finding out the "what do I do?" part of your query.

For me, there are two distinct sides to anal, the physical and the psychological. i'm a complete bottom, so i'm receptive on both counts. Not every Top who has fucked me had the same method or skill. i've had guys who just rammed in without a clue or concern for how that affected me (though some really like that). That approach doesn't fit who i am either physically or psychologically. But i know that's me.

Other Tops/Doms take great care and relish the process of seducing and opening Their bottom. taking possession of it and making it Their own. That, for me is both a physical and psychological approach that results in a whole lot more than just the physical act of anal penetration.

Re: Anal

Huntmaster​(dom male) • Aug 17, 2020

Re: Anal

Huntmaster​(dom male) • Aug 17, 2020

Aquarius Dom​(dom male) • Aug 17, 2020

Lube with a built in mild soothing local anaesthetic and application of Arnica cream afterwards!
Though going straight from virgin ass to full on butt fuck is never the best idea !
Patience and a good set of training plugs will help !!

Miki​(masochist female) • Aug 17, 2020

At the risk of being the echo in the room, if you don't want it, don't do it. He can either deal or move on.

I love it, but that is beside the point, I was willing and eager to try, fully knowing the (no pun intended) ins and outs of it.


Do not do it unless you really want to try. Failing that will be a crappy (pun intended) experience for both.

FunCouple​{.-Couple-.} • Aug 17, 2020

Might I suggest a ginger root, cut into the shape of a butt plug, and slipped into your BF’s bum.
Give him a few moments.
It may change his mind on wanting to put you through the anal ringer (no pun intended).
Hope this helps.
FC

Onlinedomguy​(dom male) • Aug 17, 2020

If you hate something you hate it. I am assuming you have tried in the past and it was not enjoyable at all for you. I believe you have to respect hard limits.

If however you are willing to experiment there have been some good suggestions already. I think incorporating some anal play slowly is the best way to explore. Someone mentioned using pinky finger to penetrate as a starting point. I would also consider the importance of anal foreplay as well to help you relax and be open to it.

I use my lips and tongue to tease and touch in around and over. My hands to rub and massage cheeks, and also play with her pussy and clit with my other hand. Teasing and touching in ways she seems to enjoy before worrying about penetration with my finger or anything else. Just trying to find different ways to get her excited and feeling safe and then when I start to penetrate, i go slowly and press in and then pull out, going a bit deeper with each attempt. I might spank her a bit depending on how she reacts to it. The point is to take your time and to find ways to stimulate and stoke the flames a bit before moving onto more intense stimulation.

There are toys that can help as well, but i think to see if it is something you might consider, being playful and using lots of different touching before trying penetration is best.

Of course it is fine if it is a hard limit for you.