Are you a true Gaslighter?

SweetSirRendering​(sub female) • Sep 3, 2020

we are giving gaslighters too much credit if we think they are steps ahead or clever. they are quite simple. they are like a cornered animal, really, and they will bite and scratch and do the craziest things to feel like they are no longer being threatened. not realizing that there was no actual threat. i see a persecution complex with a lot of these people as well.

those that cannot handle personal accountability, reshape (lie) the narrative to attempt to shift the focus and blame or to try to distract. if i ever engage with this behavior on a public forum, it is to make sure the reality is clearly stated and represented while they run their circles around it. they become more emotional throughout often shifting between aggressor and victim, while i remain calm. they make and tighten their own noose, and those they are attempting to manipulate can clearly see it. it serves to preserve the truth and not give an unchecked voice to individuals that could do harm to others with misinformation.

in relationships with people like this, it is difficult because we have an emotional investment. in these situations with a person you know, it is definitely best to state that you know what is real and know their perception they are projecting is a manipulation attempt; that you care for them and want honesty in your relationships. end of convo. <3

of course it is totally fine to revisit conversations later when they are no longer on the defensive, as communication is the lifeblood of any relationship.

just trust yourself, you know what is real and remain calm. <3

simplylaura​(sub female){djinni} • Sep 3, 2020

I was tired and punchy and let myself be drawn in and gahhhh. I know better than that! I keep professional boundaries all day so I think my gaslight filter was well, out of gas.

SweetSirRendering​(sub female) • Sep 3, 2020

anyone that participated in defending human dignity, self identification, and inclusivity contributed to a community. this allows people to read and learn to be better together. <3 in think maybe you acted because you knew it was right.

Anti social personality vs Narcissistic personality.

Devotedsub​(sub female){His} • Sep 3, 2020

Antisocial personality D/o is slightly different from Narcissistic personality D/o. They are similar in many ways, however the Antisocial personality tends to be outwardly aggressive and displays unlawful behaviors/impulsiveness. They disregard the law, while violating the rights of others. Whereas, Narcissistic personalities are less likely to be hostile and agressive / law breakers and tend not to be as impulsive in nature. Narcissistic personalities tend to thrive on admiration.

The similarities are both types lack empathy, prey on dependent people, are shallow, unforgiving, and tend to exploit others.

Sometimes it's difficult to tell the difference between the two because they are so closely related. But the biggest difference I have seen is Narcissists really really thrive on being admired. They want you to give them all the attention. When you don't, it pisses them off.

Both personalities use gaslighting. And often

SweetSirRendering​(sub female) • Sep 3, 2020

i think it best that we let therapists diagnose people, as we are not qualified to be throwing labels on people of any kind, especially those we don’t actually know. we can however, recognize behaviors, to help navigate our interactions with others. <3

so many layers to people and dynamics. we don’t have all the answers and i think we must remain inclusive for anyone that comes here to learn, grow, connect, etc, even those that make a mistake.

Devotedsub​(sub female){His} • Sep 3, 2020

Lol. I have a degree in psychology. I am only stating what the types of personality disorders are @SweetSirRendering. Not trying to put any label on any one specific person

SweetSirRendering​(sub female) • Sep 4, 2020

i wanted to make sure. i do understand based on the correlation to the topic. my school days were a lifetime away and i never worked in the industry, so i am not qualified

i see disorders posted across social media like this and it often follows with a slew of people calling out and attempting to diagnose those who they felt scorned them. i’m sure with your experience, you can see how that is problematic when there is often more to the story.

Devotedsub​(sub female){His} • Sep 4, 2020

It is unfortunate that people place these labels. But I do see it often, yes. So I understand your concern. Often people are upset about how something happened within a dynamic or relationship and that is the first thing they jump to... Kind of a defense mechanism of types. If they place a label on them, somehow maybe it will make them feel better. But it isn't healthy for sure. You might see traits of one of these things in a person, but it doesn't necessarily mean they fit a criteria for a diagnosis. Without a diagnosis from a professional, labels like that are meaningless and can affect a person's character, especially if posted all over the place on social media or spread otherwise.

Gaslighting

FeistyMinx​(sub female){HAPPYL❤VE} • Sep 4, 2020

Peach it girl!!!
I'm not kidding. I can't stand, cannot absolutely fucking stand a fucker that has absolutely no security with themselves because that's what it boils down to. They want you to be them, they want you to like them, they want you to do what they want you to do and fuck you and your personality. They have no security and possibly no self-esteem because they want yours and they will feed off of you by molding you into what they want because then they think somehow that you're just like them and that's when they begin to gain security and self-esteem when they know they control you. It's fucking sick!!!!!
If you're a gaslighter, please hate me because I ain't got to fuck with you.

Devotedsub​(sub female){His} • Sep 4, 2020

@FeistyMinx
Yes, exactly. Their self confidence/esteem is so low.. That they want to build yours so they can feed off yours because they will NEVER admit they have a self confidence / esteem issue of their own. They will never admit they are wrong. They always will be right. They will shape you into what they want, telling you they are helping you. In reality, they are using you, to build themselves up, to build their ego. They thrive on control. That control makes them feel good and they forget all about their own shortcomings. When you take that control from them or make them feel they aren't doing something right... They no longer want you because you are no longer fulfilling that role they need and want you in. They need to feel important. They need you to never question them. They need this for their own self-assurance. Unfortunately, people who get caught up with them often are dependent in nature and find it difficult to break free on their own. When they are thrown out because they are no longer of use to this person anymore, they are damaged...