Gorean

Gorean

House Talion​(dom male) • Sep 21, 2021

I had the interesting time of going over someone's profile that seems to contradict itself. It clearly states "I want to be part of a Gorean society." And "I'm a slave, but I'm not a doormat. "

Now I've always said you as individuals rake what you want from this lifestyle and make it your own, but when a large group of ppl have made a society you want to be a part of you cant exactly 'take a part of their society and make it your own' and then expect them to completely accept you.

Was curious as to what others thought about this.

Bunnie • Sep 21, 2021

Taking parts and making things their own is what makes up most of this lifestyle as I’ve seen it. Anyone who believes in following a strict set of beliefs are condemned as “one true wayists.”

Just look at the many different varieties of what is considered Master/slave.

Everyone attaches a stigma to certain words. Regardless of whether those words are accurate for them or not, some people desperately want to be “that thing” that they believe that word encompasses. It saddens me to see that, but I do understand how it can happen so easily. This is a difficult and confusing path to walk. It’s hard to learn who we are and what we want. Sometimes the only way that can be achieved is by trying things on and discovering what doesn’t fit.

Re: Gorean

Miki​(masochist female) • Sep 21, 2021

Truncated for relevance...

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I like that. "...Rake from this 'lifestyle'..." Yes, though it's a typo I can dig it.

As for Gorean.. I looked that term up and still can't really figure it out except it's definitely not something I'm into.

But the rest of the post, yes, take what you need and leave the rest, as it were. That's definitely my bag of chips, and what I express to all who write and ask what I'm into, or not.

There shouldn't be any "official doctrine" as to what constitutes something like "real BDSM" -- and what makes it a blast is the freedom to express oneself as one wishes in this stuff.

However, if one wants to refer to themselves as a Gorian or any other specific method and/or dynamic, they should adhere to the respective principles established therein.

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Now how's that for a gas-bag way of saying "To each their own but When in Rome..."

DrWakko • Sep 21, 2021

I don't think there is anything wrong with taking part of something and making it your own, how ever if you label yourself "X" don't be surprised or upset if someone questions you for being "X". So if you say you are Gorian because you took a few things from Gor and someone who also identifies as Gor might question if you. Its the same thing when you see people say they are devout Christians and also into BDSM. Someone who is a "good" Christian might question them. Even on a simple level people call themselves doms or subs even though they will never take it outside the computer. They feel they are real and probably get questioned all the time by those who go to munches and live as real life Doms and subs.

I think at the end of the day if you are happy with your life choice and someone questions you and you can explain it to them then its a win for the day.

SubtleHush​(sub female) • Sep 21, 2021

These lifestyles are lifestyles, not dictatorships.

It usually shakes out that you get involved and naturally focus on those to who you most relate.

Personally, I see Gore as pure fiction, not a lifestyle. But I'm a Trekkie so there ya go lol If it floats your boat, cool. The little I know about Gore is that it does seem to advocate usable women with little will, or that was my impression.

Talone your phrasing in the original post makes me wonder how much actual experience you've had in various groups. In a very real way, this is a consumer issue. You choose who you invest your time and energy in. If you don't find that in the first group you continue on to others. Those who try once and bail on it complaining that all groups are this or that are just justifying their laziness or unwillingness to invest.

(You didn't say that, however, just a general experience.)

Gaiawolf​(sub female){RogueWolf} • Sep 26, 2021

I started in a Gorean chat room. It was something that excited and intrigued me to no end, but as the Masters in the room took the time to teach me, it was not where I was meant to be. I went in blind, so to speak, but one of the first things I learned was my place. When you immerse yourself in an aspect of the lifestyle that has strict protocols and rules, you don't get to pick which ones you want to follow while in that space. You want to be a respected woman in a Gorean space, then be a free woman. You want to serve, well then hunny you start on your knees on the floor doing anything anyone asks of you and work your way to a cushion and respect. Just my 2 cents.

No Body​(dom male) • Sep 26, 2021

I had a friend who read the books and she wanted to try it so for 4 hours she was a slave of Gor and I walked her through what she was going to go through. Her boyfriend wanted to fight me till I gave him the first book and told him what she wanted. He gave the book back later said he was sorry and they never talked to me again. You have to think about what you want and try it but not blame others when it not to your liking. It is also why i do not tell other what I am into until they ask and even then "are you sure you want to know this is the time to back out and shut up."