Subspace?

tallslenderguy​(other male) • Dec 7, 2021

i've experienced sub space on very few occasions, maybe only once. i spent a weekend with a Dom i met vacationing in Palm Springs and He managed to regress me (age wise). It was a profound experience, something that was not even on my radar, but He got me there and i didn't realize what was happening or had happened till several days later. i'm not even sure He realized what He did, that He may just have been being Himself while i was sucking His cock, and that was the effect He had on me? idk, i went there though and found my way back on my own, though He did end up getting a piece of my heart.

Spellbound Wytch{Mr. Parker} • Dec 7, 2021

I personally believe that too many people assign "sub space" mystical properties. It's an altered state of mind to be sure - but so is tossing back a few glasses of wine and getting a buzz. Adults can navigate that situation without praise, hugs and cuddles and someone to hold their hand and tell them what a "good" (fill in the blank) they are. Having said that - YES. It's human nature to want to share intimate experiences with another person and most of the time that sharing results in an intensified bond, BUT the implication that it's somehow dangerous /risky or inadvisable to experience that intensity unless the dominant party is physically present to "talk you back" completely confounds me. Just one more example of why I'm NOT a submissive I suppose.

tallslenderguy​(other male) • Dec 7, 2021

i get how you feel i think, though it did feel pretty magical at the time lol.

i identify as a total bottom with some sub. i typically put it in that order and with that qualifier. To me, my submissive nature is still completely under my control, even when i choose to submit. i do not see what sometimes qualifies and 'submission' as submitting, but acquiescence. To me acquiescence and submission are very different.

i cannot speak for anyone else but myself, but certainly did not mean to imply i was in any sort of dangerous or untenable 'space.' It actually was a highlight experience of my sexual life and opened both my experience and understanding to something i had never even considered as a potential connecting place in me (i.e. "regression").
my own take on kink relationship in general is that it's for adults who take responsibility for their acts and decisions. One of the things i felt during and after our interaction was 'adoration' for this Guy. That was a new one for me. i tired to communicate the effect He had, but i'm not sure He understood, which led me to conclude it was chemistry not a purposeful effort on His part to regress me. idk, but it really doesn't matter either way. i was just fine and richer for the experience.

Spellbound Wytch{Mr. Parker} • Dec 7, 2021

I totally relate to your own experience. I identify as a bottom, too. I've only felt submissive to two men in my life and married both of them. Any other man (or woman) thinking they're going to dictate what I say or do, what I eat, when I go to bed or get up or how I dress or who I talk to will get a rude awakening. I don't need to be micromanaged by anyone.


You're not the one (of many) that I've seen trying to tell someone that subspace needs to be supervised by some all knowing and always capable dominant person. I honestly believe a lot of these kinds of remarks are made out of that ever present NEED for those types to want to be in absolute control of literally everything in someone else's life and that they're truly convinced that submissive types would forget to breathe if not reminded.

I'm still close friends with my ex who's living. He is a licensed forensic psychologist/hypnotherapist and also has an M.D. in psychiatry . That feeling you described of having been in a trance like state is one familiar to me and it's the floatiest and warmest feeling I've ever had the pleasure of experiencing. I'm happy that you were able to experience a similar state as well. Even me calling it a "trance" like state isn't worrisome to me. I regularly play the self-hypnosis tapes he's made for me over the years and never feel untethered or as if I'm floundering just because he's not physically present. At any rate, I can relate to your own approach to kink more than I can to most people.

Re: Subspace?

LongerJohnny​(dom male) • Dec 8, 2021

First - That is awesome! Congrats to you and your Sir.
I suspect if you keep going at this rate you will be far beyond 10 minutes soon.
Imagine 30 minutes. Or an Hour. Or more.

To your question - stop trying to name it, define it, expect it, or anything else extraneous.
Just love it and experience it and repeat it if you can.
Start with "Helluva orgasm" and go from there.
It already has everything it needs to be a good thing, and the potential to be more. It doesn't need a name too.