Masters/Owners

Masters/Owners

FracturedPeaks​(switch female) • Jul 17, 2024

So this is going to be a bit long and before I start I just want to say, I don’t judge anyone for what they enjoy or what brings them fulfillment. I hope I don’t accidentally offend anyone but I need some help understanding. I’ve met a lot of owners/masters lately. As a Dom sometimes I can see the appeal that kind of submission can bring, but as a submissive it gives me a lot of anxiety. I am curious how a master/owner can treat a submissive as an object constantly and not begin to lose sight that they are people. Especially Doms who like to degrade and humiliate their submissives.

So instead of jumping to conclusions I figured I might as well ask. Do you see your “slaves” as people? Do you ever lose sight of the fact that they are human beings with a soul? I realize master/slave dynamics take a lot of trust and time to build, so getting to that point in the relationship where everyone is comfortable with that dynamic is a lot of work. And I’m certain most Doms/subs work very hard.

I also am just curious about the sorts of people who become Dom’s who want to own a person. What drives someone to want to have complete control over every little thing a submissive does? How do you regulate yourself to make sure those feelings don’t become toxic or abusive?

I know most Doms are good people. They want to support, guide, and care for a submissive. They are self aware and have good self control. I don’t want anyone to get the impression that I view masters as something bad. This is me trying to work through some feelings and gain understanding rather than make assumptions. Any input would be greatly appreciated.

Sweetlydepraved​(masochist female){Mostly} • Jul 17, 2024

There is a common misconception that “master/owner can treat a submissive as an object constantly”. I suppose the misconception is that he will treat a submissive like an object constantly. There’s also the misconception that he must, you know, to earn his “owner pants”.

Ownership is defined by the owner, my Daddy has the right to treat his property like an object anytime he chooses and for how long he chooses. That doesn’t mean he chooses to all of the time because he is wise enough to understand that while I am his property, I’m also a mother and a professional in my field. He wants me to excel in those areas, so he is very careful that things remain balanced so I can be all of the things. I think at most he has done hardcore objectification for 2 solid weeks. That number will tick upward when we’re living together, he feels that it’s irresponsible to push me too hard when he isn’t around to constantly evaluate me.

TopekaDom​(dom male) • Jul 17, 2024

I think your missing the fact that most Owners focus on Responsibility than Possession.

Yes there are a few who simply want to own an s type, but they are typically looking for sex. Real owners look to improve their property and value them as people, as well as an object. M/s is not always about naked s types in cages, locked in a cold basement. Really it should be about education, protection, sculpting (of the spirit), and making things better for the s type.

House Talion​(dom male) • Jul 17, 2024

Personally I've never liked the humiliation aspects of such dynamics. But that is as society sees it and as I've taught and trained for both sides of that spectrum yoy take whatbyou want from the lifestyle, make it your own, and anyone that says you're doing it wrong isn't worth your time

CruelPuppetMaster​(dom male) • Jul 18, 2024

Hello. Well, you raise several interesting points.

"Doms who like to degrade and humiliate their submissives. "
Only people can be degraded, not objects. You may be treating them like an object in order to degrade and humiliate them, but it is implicit that they are not truly objects, or they wouldn't feel a thing. It is only degrading to be treated as furniture because you are not: if either party loses sight of that then the thrill is gone. And the appeal of degradation and humiliation is the same as the appeal of the whip and the paddle: to express dominance by causing the submissive to suffer.

"Do you see your 'slaves' as people?"
Absolutely. And I specifically train them not to be robotic: ultra-formal at all times, never initiate, speak when spoken to and only Yes/No/Thank you. I have literally told MySexPuppet, "I don't want an automaton that obeys orders and that's all. I want a real woman with her own thoughts and ideas and humor: I just want her in chains at my feet."

"complete control over every little thing a submissive does"
I can't say, because I *don't* want that. I don't want the responsibility, I don't want the time commitment, I don't want a woman who's not capable of managing her life.

I hope that was a bit helpful.

CPM