Is Public Scening really a case of showing off?

Is Public Scening really a case of showing off?

TopekaDom​(dom male) • Aug 2, 2024

While running through my fet feed, I came across a photo of small sign that read "Fuck off, Scene in Progress". Obviously it was something used in a dungeon, being used to continue their scene without being disturbed (which I fully understand and that is not what I am questioning).

Scening is hard and can take a good deal of concentration. Losing one's place during a scene can be dangerous and coming out of Dom Space is a real downer.

But my question why is one placing themselves in such straits by scening in public such as large kinky gatherings.

Yes, some of them are educational. But these are during classes, where such a sign as above is not needed.
Others say it is to satisfy their public exposure. I call bullshit on this one because they are amoung those who also enjoy the same activities. So there is not shame or feeling of "getting away with it".

So what is left?

I think it is a thing of saying "Look at what I can do! Look at what I can do with my s type!"

Which is ego.

Discuss:

Sincorrigible​(sub female) • Aug 2, 2024

From a subspace point of view, it can be incredibly erotic. Freeing, liberating. Yes exhibitionism, but more than that. Being shown off, being exhibited. The control in action of being made to play in public. I've had some incredibly intense physical play sessions in clubs.

It was not about ego as far as I could make out. It was about a new space, friends, others being involved, kink friendly place and space. Kit!! And for the submissive, vulnerability and fear to a point.

And the permission to watch others, see dynamics in action. Wow. What a thrill and a privilege.

Would never want only the public. A dynamic for me needs private space. But the public is a thrilling addition.

Literate Lycan​(dom male) • Aug 2, 2024

I take it you are being specific to events and not just shagging in the public park behind an oak tree.

Perhaps it is ego. Perhaps it is a case of "Look at me. I am so proud of what I'm doing." Good for them. They should be proud, especially if they are doing it right. Or at least trying. And theoretically this is the crowd to do it in front of. So why not? A crowd of their peers. (I also typed leers. Which would fit)

Maybe it's the fear of getting caught in the corner when they aren't exhibitionists or the excitement of having an audience. For some individuals, that is their kink - having the audience. Plenty of actors are petrified of being in front of a crowd or up on stage, but that is part of the thrill of the stage! The exultation of finishing the play against great internal adversity. And can you imagine being so nervous but also trying to reach climax?

So, regardless of the reason, if you see someone getting it on in a "private" public place, don't interfere but definitely applaud. Or just admire. Good question, Topeka.

House Talion​(dom male) • Aug 2, 2024

Ideally not everyone has the equipment and furniture as a well made dungeon does. So ppl like to play with good stuff and if you see a sign like that then they either want privacy or they're taking picts so leave them alone. Such spaces in a well known dungeon are sometimes rented and reserved ahead of time.

Simply put grab a saw horse and secure it open, then find space for it in your closet.

Bunnie • Aug 2, 2024

Most people I know that play at our local, do so because they don’t have the bigger equipment at home, or rope anchor points. There are also those who don’t have anyone to play with privately.
As for me personally, I’m not a big public scene-r, however, when I have (mostly rope), I actually completely forget there are other people around because I’m so focused on what’s occurring between myself and the other person.
Yes, there are definitely exhibitionists (I think they’re pretty obvious). Is it an ego thing? I can’t say because I’m not them. My observations lead me to believe it’s a bit of ego boost, a bit of enjoying being watched, and a bit of enjoying feeding off the atmosphere of the environment. For every person who enjoys being watched there are just as many who enjoy watching, so that in itself creates its own little connection.

As for the sign, I can completely understand that. There’s nothing worse than having someone interrupt a scene.

intenseoldman​(dom male) • Aug 2, 2024

All very enlightening. Got stuff at home, but to Bunnie's point, nothing big or any anchor points for suspension, so that would be a good reason to attend a public dungeon. All I've witnessed are shows in Amsterdam. I would go to a dungeon for the education, and, yeah.. the thrills. As far as motives for public performance go, I'm with LL, I wouldn't care ... I'd just applaud. Hmmm... you know a couple of eye bolts in the ceiling would be pretty simple, and couple more on the wall. Used to hang game from them, so, they'd be safe. Good forum.

SirDomCE​(dom male) • Aug 7, 2024

If you call being an exhibitionist "showing off"? A riveting rousing thrilling experience or just another kink...depends who you pose the question to I suppose.

fluffypoppet​(sub female){Protected} • Aug 7, 2024

The dungeon offers bigger toys and gear and doodads. There are also new people.

As a feral sub living out here in the wild, I was more willing to engage in pick up play in the dungeon not because there were people who would watch, but because I believed there were people who would intervene if I was distressed.
- friends I came with
- staff working the dungeon
- other ethical kinksters

Were other people watching me? Maybe… did I notice them? Not at all. It was 10,000% not about them and if I had thought of it as a public performance I wouldn’t have been able to enjoy the experience. I’m shy.

TopekaDom​(dom male) • Aug 7, 2024

Mainly I envisioned the Dom/mes doing the showing off. Since they are not really experiencing the humiliation part of exhibition, then, yes, I would call it showing off.

Sincorrigible​(sub female) • Aug 7, 2024

But what if it's all about the dynamic? Doing whatever in public to further the relationship and connection? I've definitely experienced public play where it was all about me and him. The other people, the public nature of it, were irrelevant. He was proving something only to me. Is that showing off?