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Therapy

Heart of Persephone​(sub female)
1 day ago • Jan 19, 2025

Therapy

What are your thoughts on therapy? Do you think it should be utilized individually and also as Couples sessions. I feel that it should be used to help navigate many areas of our lives. Helping to help clear communication issues that can and will cause issues if not understood by each person.
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Shewolf
1 day ago • Jan 19, 2025
Shewolf • Jan 19, 2025
I think therapy can offer a lot of benefits. When I think of couples therapy, I feel it's important to remember that each person in the relationship is their own person with their own history outside of the relationship. That history contributes to what they bring to a relationship. So, I am a supporter of both individual and couples therapy. Knowing oneself is important in any relationship. In romantic relationships, our partners often see parts of us that others have not - even the most difficult/hard to deal with parts. Relationships can help us uncover parts of ourselves we may have yet to discover. Therapy can be a great place to address those things together and individually.
bdsamworld​(sub female)​{collared}
1 day ago • Jan 20, 2025
Therapy is a great tool for MANY reasons. But the thing is finding a therapist that works with you and your lifestyle. My current therapist understands kink/BDSM, but not poly. However, she's never judgemental and based anything I say around my feelings instead of her own opinion. Which sadly she's the first therapist I found like this. 😒

There are some people who go to couples therapy just to do check ins to make sure they get ahead of any problems. And others who go to work on problems that one person might be having together. Or just one person in therapy.
intenseoldman​(dom male)
12 hours ago • Jan 20, 2025
intenseoldman​(dom male) • Jan 20, 2025
Shewolf wrote:
I think therapy can offer a lot of benefits. When I think of couples therapy, I feel it's important to remember that each person in the relationship is their own person with their own history outside of the relationship. That history contributes to what they bring to a relationship. So, I am a supporter of both individual and couples therapy. Knowing oneself is important in any relationship. In romantic relationships, our partners often see parts of us that others have not - even the most difficult/hard to deal with parts. Relationships can help us uncover parts of ourselves we may have yet to discover. Therapy can be a great place to address those things together and individually.

After about nine months of therapy, I think I'm finally getting to know myself. Should I ever be in a serious relationship again, I would want couples therapy, too. I mean, I don't know when you are ever done with therapy.
bdsamworld wrote:
But the thing is finding a therapist that works with you and your lifestyle. My current therapist understands kink/BDSM, but not poly. However, she's never judgemental and based anything I say around my feelings instead of her own opinion. Which sadly she's the first therapist I found like this. 😒

There are some people who go to couples therapy just to do check ins to make sure they get ahead of any problems. And others who go to work on problems that one person might be having together. Or just one person in therapy.

My therapist is as you describe, maybe not understanding of all my kink but never judgmental. In fact, when I talk about it, she makes some very keen observations, that have helped me be more accepting of my kink identity. She's spiritual, too. Her knowledge and experience in Astrology, Human Design, and meditation have all helped me in therapy. Yeah, I was rejected by two therapists before we found each other. I never knew what it would be like. I mean it's a self guided journey, but she sure as fuck helps me get where I'm going and throws up some sign posts when I need a nudge. There are questions from our first session that I only now know enough about myself to answer.

If I'm ever fortunate enough to be in a serious relationship, you can bet your bottom dollar, we'll be check'n in. I don't know but I believe, you have a lot better chance of maintaining a relationship than you do of saving one.

Thanks, OP, for this post. Lots of insight in your post and its replies icon_smile.gif
Aradia Nightshade​(other female)
11 hours ago • Jan 20, 2025
I wouldn't necessarily use the word "should" when referring to therapy. Therapy used to be this secret thing people did because of the stigma. There is still stigma associated with mental illness, but now more than ever, it's becoming more accepted.

I think that if a couple chooses to have therapy together, it's then important to have individual therapy as well. There might be things that come up in couples therapy that should be addressed by the individual in order for them to have a healthy relationship. With the right therapist and willingness to do the work, therapy can works wonders.

There's so much we can learn about ourselves if we are provided with the right guidance and a safe place to explore without feeling ridiculed or judged.

Finding a therapist who understands kink and BDSM might be tricky in some areas, but there are online therapy options now that remove barriers like location. There is zero shame in seeking therapy.