Dom is very angry

Low{BLK OWND} • Nov 3, 2019

Miss Bonnie and Bunnie I think what you said helped me figure it out
He had actually been to a funeral for an Auntie he was close to on the same day I did not text
He needed support but I did not know about the funeral until after the fact
Dumb luck
Also he is very big on respect especially in areas that keep us connected
So that's it
We have talked I asked him for more specific rules on those things he feels connects us and he asked me to tell him if I need anything more in that area
Its actually been 2 and 1 half years I've been sending the goodmorning text so I should have seen how it would impact him that I didn't send it...not that he ever said it was special though

Re: Dom is very angry

Miki​(masochist female) • Nov 3, 2019

If he is this cranked-up over a "good morning" text, and does this more than once-- think of yourself. You are not an actual slave, as such is defined and either call a time out, sit his ass down and work this out-- or show him the door. As it is I cringe when i read about all the other things you deny yourself in your role as his sub and though I am not a "true Sub" by the 'official definitions"laid out by some-- that kind of restriction chokes the soul. Provided you're OK with it, and you seem to be-- the blow-up over a missed text is over the top and really should not be tolerated.

Personally, and speaking only for myself I'd have told the guy to pack up his schlong and get lost.

"But hey, that's just me."

MasterBear​(other butch) • Nov 4, 2019

There are massive red flags all over this.

1) your angry D type isnt talking
2)you are automatically defending yourself as not a cheater-- does your D type accuse you of this?
3) you seem surprised at a negative outcome for forgetting a morning text. Were expectations and consequences not discussed?
4) your fear seems out of proportion to the event.


Im concerned for you.

Low{BLK OWND} • Nov 4, 2019

Thank you for your concern however
He is rarely angry within the 2 1/2years together it's been twice counting this event
He does not accuse me of cheating but it was explained in the beginning he wants loyalty
I was surprised at the negative outcome because the good morning actually was not discussed as absolute
I'm not afraid just a little confused
Thank you though I truly value your advice and enjoy reading the things you write

SSG{ENM-TLP} • Nov 4, 2019

Good morning is a BIG DEAL. It sets the tone for the entire day. It says, "I am thinking about you." Personally, if my Master didn't message me every morning, I would worry His mind was too much on something else. I need to know that He is thinking of me, and He needs to know that I am thinking of Him. O/our morning ritual isn't negotiable, unless there is a doctor's appointment or an emergency. Some things can't be helped. But if there is and it was something planned, W/we notify each other in advance. If there is an emergency, W/we leave a message and the message serves as Good morning.

Little momma​(sub female) • Nov 4, 2019

I agree with SSG. Two or three simple words set the tone for the day. Though never asked, once I wake up a quick "Good morning" let's my Dom know He's the first thing on my mind. If I don't hear those words back I start to wonder if He's ok and if everything is ok with His family.

AKittenforSir​(sub female){JohnBond} • Nov 4, 2019

I find this relatable. My Sir has never said I must say “good morning” upon waking up, but since I have done so every single day for the past 9 months, I know with pretty clear certainty that if I failed to do so he would be upset.

I’ve also had confused moments of “why are you so upset?!” by things I thought were trivial and yet he seemed to view it as major. In the moment when I’m feeling defensive, I also start mentally listing the “I didn’t cheat, I didn’t lie, I wasn’t ignoring or disobeying him, etc” as a defense mechanism to reassure myself that he is indeed overreacting and I didn’t really do anything wrong.

But usually with a little time and communication, I can see why he was so upset and that I probably should or shouldn’t have done whatever it was that got us to this point of friction.

I’m glad you guys have talked it out a bit and you have some clarity now. Two and a half years is a long time to build a routine that once broken can certainly cause uproar. I’m also sure that wasn’t your intentions. So hopefully it’ll smooth over shortly.

Fyglia Wicked​(dom female) • Nov 4, 2019

Did you know about the funeral? Either way for him to lash out over something that happened once on 2 years tells me he isn't as emotional stable as he should be.

Little momma​(sub female) • Nov 4, 2019

People, Dom and sub alike, act out when strong emotions are involved. It could have been a very strong emotional event for her Dom and he needed that morning connection to help him get through. Since we have only heard Low's side, it would be unfair to pass judgement or make assumptions about her Dom's emotional stability or mental health.

Low{BLK OWND} • Nov 5, 2019

no I did not until after about 2 he called to tell me