Self Pleasure

LittleSubFox​(sub female) • Mar 14, 2021

You guys are amazing 😭😭😭 thank you so much. It's beyond frustrating cause I get stimulated and feel the pleasure, but then when I get right to the peak, and ready to possibly finish, it's like a power outage and the feeling completely goes away. I thought maybe THAT was me finishing? But I don't feel satisfied after. I'll definitely try using toys or something.

Miki​(masochist female) • Mar 14, 2021

This has been said already but might as well add 2 cents to the till.

Not abnormal. It's about mindset. You have to be aroused to begin with.

Never mind not getting off when you rub one off, a fair share of women miss the happy bus having sex with a partner. Others think of someone other than the dude boning them (for example, insert gender preference here)

And it's especially hard to get off when the partner you end up with climbs aboard, goes "humpity bumpity hump", squirts his Man-naise and rolls over like a rotten log without consideration.

So back to the masturbation, arousal, external stimulation are so very important for us, and there are so many ways to achieve that (me, for example, like to do it in the mirror.... Twisted, huh?)

The worst thing you can do is think about it too much. The more frustrated you get by not being able to ring your bell, the more unlikely it becomes that it won't happen.

* * *

I don't know if that helped, but in combination with all the other posts, you can and will work past this annoying issue. I had the same problem when I was quite young and just discovering the art of self-enjoyment

Zedland​(dom male) • Mar 14, 2021

The only advice I can offer is sometimes things are easier done when you don't set out to do them. (Yes that sounded just as dumb in my head) In essence if you set out to do something, in this case cum, you instantly put all that mental pressure on yourself to do it. Instead try getting comfy somewhere nice and private with a good book, glass of wine, laptop, or whatever floats your boat. Let things progress naturally as you view whatever material.

Hopefully a pleasant surprise sneaks up on you.

ellefire​(sub female) • Mar 14, 2021

Just to add another two cents..... I've found that there are so many different types of orgasms, and sometimes (whether alone or directed or physically with someone else) I might not get the "big one" but little ones sneak up and are so much fun! The full body-shakers, for me, require both clit and ass stimulation. The little ones can be really intense and almost sharp, and can involve copious gushing, but the full body rolling ones that feel like they go on and on and on provide less external evidence of pleasure.

Pleasure is also cumulative I think. Hearing and seeing true pleasure in someone else (maybe not the fabricated moans of some porn stars) feeds mine, especially if it's someone whose pleasure is important to me.

Let it roll and have fun!

Kelpi • Mar 14, 2021

No your not alone but it is a problem when there is no one to watch or tell you what to do and how to do it. I loved my ex when she did it. OH my it was great helping her by telling her dirty stories or fantasies. I loved watching her play with her self and knowing when she would cum. Think I will call and see how she is.

Re: Self Pleasure

emmmllliiininenine​(sub female) • Mar 14, 2021

You are not broken. Some women can very easily and others it takes more. Try out everything you can is my advice. Everyone gets turned on by different things but id say a vibrator is really helpful. I didnt understand how easy it is to cum for years bc i didn’t understand my body and sexuality well at all. I dont really get turned on by porn or just masterbation so i can understand where you are comming from bc it can be hard. For me, i’m sapiosexual, it may be different for you, but i just like to look at a photo/video or texts of the guy i like and that turns me on and makes me cum way more than porn ever does. So if ur like me, it may just be a personal connection and you could find things that make you feel that “romance” thats hard on ur own. Just try to do some thorough research into your body and things to try. Dont forget vibrators work miracles lol.

OG Cupcake{4everAlone} • Mar 15, 2021

I'll be honest, im 42 and still don't know my body that well sexually. take your time, explore yourself, try different things, ways. YOU are definitely NOT broken.

we are all different and therefore each person works differently. I will say that my HEAD is the main reason I get stuck. its not a good place to be, find ways to shut your brain off and just go.

best of luck

reply

dom daddie​(dom male) • Apr 8, 2021

what about sex toys like the "trigger or a viberstor