Now i respect everyone's choice of role but as a Dom male i need to ask. why do some men want to submit for me being dominant is manly. I am not saying that submitting makes you less of a man just like being gay does not make you less of a man. i just seek to understand the other side of things
Obviously as a female submissive I can't comment from a male sub perspective, but I kind of don't see it as a gender thing. It's the same as female Dominants. People identify with whatever makes them feel complete, regardless of stereotypes.
Submission isnt necessarily sexual gender related. Its how dominant we are and how they feel submitting.
Some straight men just dont feel right submitting to a woman, they need a strong man. I have had a couple of male sub's and it wasnt sexual, they just needed to serve someone who was capable over being mentally dominant and controlling.
Maybe their lives are totally about them being the boss, in charge and they just need to unplug from reality and a male Dom is the only thing that works?
Why do I enjoy submitting? Well, because I like to submit (a bit tautological, I know). In all seriousness, I enjoy being part of a relationship with a power exchange component. I still partake in non-kinky sex, but BDSM has to be part of the menu if I'm being honest.
On another note, I don't particularly find it useful categorizing qualities as manly or feminine, if it works for you, that's fine. I don't particularly see strength as inherently manly or gentleness as inherently feminine, same with submission or dominance, but that's just me.
Bunnie is on point when she said: "People identify with whatever makes them feel complete, regardless of stereotypes." At some point or another we all should get to that realization, hopefully sooner than later.
Oh my - what a subject! Why does a man want to submit? The same reason women want to submit. They enjoy it. It has nothing to do with masculinity or femininity. Some men enjoy ravishing and dominating women. Some men enjoy submitting to, serving, and adoring women, often in a knightly, romantic way. It doesn't make them less masculine than a man who enjoys domination. In fact, it may be a much more traditional way to relate to women. So..
Dominant is not the male position.
Submissive is not the female position.
Even if that's what you more commonly see represented in popular culture.
I'm dominant. I'm female. I am feminine. I am not less feminine because I am dominant, which would be true if we followed the logic of submission making a man less masculine.
Just as one shouldn't believe female submissives are weak, stupid women, one shouldn't believe male submissives are weak and stupid either. One of my submissives was a big burly boxer. Another was a young, tall, super fit, rowdy guy who took the lead in every other aspect of his life. I could go on.
They just enjoyed serving me but that didn't mean they bowed down to anyone else.
Thanks for the question! It's a great topic and I appreciate the sincere curiousity!
thank you all again. this is a pretty deep topic i enjoy hearing from all of you. its really making me think about things more and even seeing why i myself am a dom. its not because i do not respect women or that i am power hungry but that this is who i am and what i need.
we all should not be ashamed of who we are.
We feel like less of a man, that is why we want to be dominated by real men, men that are confident and feel comfortable in their own skin, as a male sub myself I feel like a low life and my little dick definitely makes me feel less of a man, in fact I don't consider myself a man at all, just male.