I need advice on loving God/Jesus and loving being a Sub.

God is loving and wants us to be happy

steelmaster​(dom male) • Mar 11, 2020

Our lifestyle does not go against the Bible and supports women living there man and submitting to there neeeds.

God made us with these feeling we have and would be proud of you for following what he created

jellicorn​(sub female) • Oct 12, 2020

This is very reassuring. Thank you for your kindness

Miki • Oct 12, 2020

It's wrong. But we are human and we have needs. No easy answer there, but we need SEX

Taramafor​(sub male) • Oct 12, 2020

There's actually a lot that's said in the bible that even supports multiple partners if anything. Or at least it never discourages it. But who's deciding what's good or bad either way? Even a god can't decide FOR you. Rules made by them? Well... Did you ever consent? Was you asked? Or BLINDLY follow them or try to stand up for your OWN personal beliefs? This is the difference between a mindless soldier and someone that has a reason to push themselves forward. This is the difference between someone fighting for the beliefs of others and fighting for what they think is right themselves. How much is questioned before people become sheep?

I'm atheist myself but I look at this from a stance where even a god can be "mortal". There's a good number of games and films (probably books too) that put things into perspective in that area. After all, the saying of being made in his image has to be taken into consideration. The sins aren't sins in and of themselves. And many none sins can cause harm and damage. It's LOSING yourself in something that does this. Someone blind to justice can be the monster they seek to stop. A monster can also be happy being destructive if that is controlled instead of lashing out. In order to even begin to explain why I would have to get into so much context. But basically it boils down to control, loyalty and reasons for that. Consider for a moment that if we all need to be challenged then compare this to "made in his image". Just some food for thought on that specific matter.

Remain logical and in control (or make sure another is) and you're fine. Even if that gets dark and twisted. Especially then at times. This is simply the process of making the best of whatever situation you're in. Even a god can't decide for you. But at the same time I'm not going to wait forever either. Life is moving forward. Situations will happen regardless of wherever you're ready or not.

As for other people when you're with someone, just make sure you put in the time and effort for those involved. And don't let irrational jealousy cloud your judgement. It's easy to fear the worst. But it's so often irrational. One bad experience doesn't mean all experiences in the area will be bad either. It simply makes no sense to limit your happiness together just because someone fears being replaced. That fear is not easily overcome by some people, but if that fear is present when you know you're there no matter what then it's their mistrust. Can be a bit of a minefield at times. It all depends. Being loyal is to "be there". Not "Do what I want you to do". Being loyal is to understand someone has their reasons to care about other matters, be it people or activities. Not turn your back because other things are important too. You're probably more likely to be threatened if someone is a thrill seeker climbing without harness then to another person (that is actually a thing). Unless your own partner (not the person the partner knows) is careless, gets wrapped up in things too easily and neglects without meaning too. But if that is kept in mind and prepared for then you can work things out. Just make sure that no matter what that you're "being there" and doing things together. If one person happens to be a spouse and the other is a dom/sub then "balance" things out when it comes to time/activity.

slavebilly​(sub male) • Oct 12, 2020

Hi!

I am a devout born again Christian. I dont see anything within BDSM that would conflict with my Christianity IF it is done within the bonds of marriage. So...you just have to find someone who shares your dynamics and is willing to marry you.

If all of that you find impossible, do what I decided to do...submit to the Lord Jesus. You will never find anyone better. Of course this will not involve bdsm, but it will be much more fulfilling.

Hope this helps. Feel free to message me

Literate Lycan​(dom male) • Oct 12, 2020

Throwing in my thoughts: As others have indicated, religion is not opposed to many aspects of the lifestyle. As a matter of discussion, a strong D/s relationship can strengthen any relationship. Specific to your topic title, being a submissive wife to a loving, Dominant husband pretty much lines up Biblically speaking and makes for a strong household. I’m not inferring it’s for everyone, but it can work for you if that is your desire. My father and mother, although (to my knowledge) never considered or knew much about the lifestyle, lived definitely within the confines of our religion and yet were probably the best example I’ve ever seen of D/s in actual 24/7 life. And how they played in the bedroom (although I have no real idea of what went on behind those doors nor at the age did I want to) they continued on regularly until a few months before my father passed due to cancer. But believe me, every Sunday after church, they returned home to “go upstairs and change”.

So in closing, just because it falls within the envelope of BDSM doesn’t mean it’s bad and goes against your faith. Granted, some areas may and even if they don’t others in your faith may look down upon you for them, so perhaps it isn’t something you want to bring up in Sunday conversations.

All the best.
LL

Re: I need advice on loving God/Jesus and loving being a Sub

tallslenderguy​(other male) • Oct 12, 2020

i feel you... or should say "felt" (past tense). i'm gay and grew up in a culture and era that (retrospective understanding here) conditioned me to believe that i was "broken and sinful." So, i went to "God/Jesus"" for 'healing," or at least to find a way to not 'sin'. At 19, i stood up in church and "confessed" my attraction to guys. i had been trying, just me and "God," to find healing or a way to cope, change, since i was 14. It was a daily, usually hourly struggle for me, it was pretty much continuous. After 5 years, i reasoned it was "pride" that kept me from overcoming, so i "confessed."

It took every ounce of courage i had to "confess," to open up to those who had taught me my whole life that what and who i am is broken/sinful, to reveal my secret. It became apparent very quickly, even at that age, that they didn't get it. The rule makers and enforcers often only have a cursory notion or knowledge of the things they try to control and rule over... vicariously through "God/Jesus." i realized i was alone, at least when it came to the religious people in my life understanding where i was at. So, it was just me and "God/Jesus."

i spent the next 35 years of my life trying to change who i am, just me and "God/Jesus." It would take a few books to give all the details, so much is left out in this simple post. i've had "reparative therapy," i had the "demons" cast out of me. i fasted, prayed, begged most of my life... my seeking "God/Jesus" was continuous, not just a Sunday event. i was constantly talking to "God/Jesus" begging, pleading for their help, guidance, etc..

After 35 years, i came to the end of myself. i was simply exhausted. It's not that i disbelieved or went the opposite direction, but rather i realized that i could not continue to say that i knew the things i thought i knew about "God/Jesus." i could only trace my 'knowledge' back to others, be it the bible, or other believers claiming to have 'relationship' with "God/Jesus." i realized that my "relationship" was with ideas, mine and others, about "God/Jesus," not with a literal "God/Jesus." i tried most of my life to substantiate that "relationship," but never honestly did. Believers, myself included then, call that "faith." But my faith didn't work. i don't blame "God/Jesus." So far, thay have yet to manifest in a way that i can honestly say it's not me or another making them up in some way.

i came to realize that i had made a "God/Jesus" out of my and other peoples ideas and notions of who and what they are, so i stepped away from it all. That's the first time in my life i experienced "peace." Ironic, since this religion promises "peace that surpasses understanding." my way to long processing out of religion was not without value. It gave me a heart, a ton of understanding, it ground me down to dust.

i found peace in acceptance of reality, not in the struggle to make myself fit the beliefs i had.

Sorry, there is so much more to this. i am not saying belief is good or bad, i am saying it is belief...not knowledge. Many equate their beliefs with knowledge, become absolutists, and destructive in my view. Depending on how you look at it, even Christian religion teaches that love is the rule to follow. The other rules that often usurp love don't work, because "we see through a glass darkly." i do not think we have the knowledge or understanding to make absolute rules, so love becomes important.

For what i may be worth to you, i suggest you know yourself, honestly, accept and find a way/s to live honestly and true, using love as your guiding principle.