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Road Toad
3 weeks ago • 06/18/2020 2:32 pm
Road Toad • 06/18/2020 2:32 pm
Oh Yeah, I was born at night, just not LAST NIGHT.

Ain't gonna touch that one
Just Ain't Gonna Do It!

mrpetwanter wrote:
And theres 1 thing you will never hear a woman say
i was wrong

"They" put you up to that, tell the truth now. Didn't they!
Road Toad
3 weeks ago • 06/19/2020 2:52 pm
Road Toad • 06/19/2020 2:52 pm
My Girlfriend accused me of being immature.

I told her to get out of my fort.
Road Toad
3 weeks ago • 06/21/2020 4:33 pm
Road Toad • 06/21/2020 4:33 pm
Did you know that when a woman wears a leather dress, a man's heart beats quicker, his throat gets dry, he gets weak in the knees and he begins to think irrationally?
Ever wonder why?

It's because she smells like a new golf bag!
Road Toad
3 weeks ago • 06/21/2020 4:34 pm
Road Toad • 06/21/2020 4:34 pm
A husband and wife were out playing golf. They tee off, and one drive goes to the right and one drive goes to the left. The wife finds her ball in a patch of buttercups. She grabs a club and takes a mighty swing at the ball. She hits a beautiful second shot, but in the process, she hacks the hell out of the buttercups.

Suddenly, a woman appears out of nowhere. She blocks her path to her golf bag, looks at her, and says, “I’m Mother Nature, and I don’t like the way you treated my buttercups. From now on, you won’t be able to stand the taste of butter. Each time you eat butter you will become physically ill to the point of total nausea.”

The mystery woman then disappears as quickly as she appeared.

Shaken, the wife calls out to her husband, “Hey, where’s your ball?”

“It’s over here in the pussy willows.”

The wife screams back, “DON’T HIT THE BALL!!! DON’T HIT THE BALL!!!”
samsah​(sub male)
3 weeks ago • 06/21/2020 10:27 pm
samsah​(sub male) • 06/21/2020 10:27 pm
What is Bruce Lee’s favorite drink? Wataaaaah!
3 weeks ago • 06/21/2020 11:25 pm
RealisticDom • 06/21/2020 11:25 pm
On another BDSM site, I got a reply from a woman who said she was bored with her husband.

I sent her my laundry.

Hopefully that helps.
3 weeks ago • 06/21/2020 11:34 pm

Science humor?

RealisticDom • 06/21/2020 11:34 pm
twoSidestwoEveryCoin wrote:
Why can't you trust atoms?...

Because they make up everything 😝

Argon walks into a bar and sits down. As he sits, he stumbles and knocks over someone's beer. The guy swears at him, screams at him, even throws a punch.
Argon doesn't react.
2 weeks ago • 06/22/2020 12:01 am
Bunnie • 06/22/2020 12:01 am
Stop, drop and roll was such a big deal as a kid...

I seriously thought I’d be on fire more than this as an adult.
LittleMissM​(sub female)
2 weeks ago • 06/22/2020 12:11 am
LittleMissM​(sub female) • 06/22/2020 12:11 am
"Of course I won't laugh," said the nurse. "I am a professional. In over 20 years of working here, I've never laughed at a patient."

"Okay, then," said Bob, and he proceeded to drop his trousers revealing the smallest male part the nurse had ever seen. In length and width, it was almost identical to a AAA battery.

Unable to control herself, the nurse tried to suppress a giggle, but it just came out. Feeling very bad at laughing at the mans part she composed herself as well as she could. "I am very sorry," she said. "I don't know what came over me. On my honor, as a nurse and a lady, I promise that won't happen again. Now, tell me, what seems to be the problem?"

"Its swollen," Bob replied.

She ran out of the room.