What Dom's want and what Dom's don't want?

What Dom's want and what Dom's don't want?

tallslenderguy​(other male) • May 11, 2020

i did a search for this, and was surprised it didn't turn anything up. Maybe i was doing the wrong words, so i'm sorry if this is redundant.

i'd like to hear (read) what Domme's or Dom's are looking for, and what really turns You off? Honestly, as a gay guy, it seems gay Dom's want different things than hetero, but figure there's got to be overlap? idk, You tell me.

i'm hoping in an open forum like this Dom's will be free to say stuff they might not feel as free to say to an individual, You know, things you wish every sub just knew?

i don't want anyone to feel excluded... anyone is welcome to share their perceptions, Dom or not, as long as you qualify your perspective?

Thank you all

skyrich​(dom male){rottenbrat} • May 12, 2020

Hi, TSG,

I have answered this is part, and pieces in other forum posts, I think. But to coalesce;

Turn ons (in no particular order): Intelligence, initiative, wit/humor, creativity, perceptive, empathy, meekness, common core interests, and ya, sexuality.

Turn offs, well, negate all of the above, and you get: stupidity, laziness, dull, uninspired/unproductive, lack of vision, unconcern, egotism/conceit, no commonality, and frigidity.

I suppose that list is common to just about everyone in some degree or another. Really, it's about making a connection. I mean if you're asking about attracting the right Dom, then all you can do is put yourself out there, and look for Doms with common core interests, then strike up a conversation. Same goes for Doms looking for the right sub.

Think of it as fishing:

1) There really are plenty of fish in the sea. Patience will always pay off.
2) You need the right "bait" to attract the Dom/sub you want. You don't catch much salmon with catfish bait. So be very clear about the message you are putting out there. Nobody likes to go fishing for lobster, and pull in hagfish. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hagfish

--Rich

MasterBear​(other butch) • May 12, 2020

What turns me off is no brains.

It happened today- there was an email- a big production on "my slave wants to talk to you"
Sure fine fine -
I ask thd s type to tell me about themselves, they send me a pic.

Ok. And...

Nothing.

Geez--- no brains.

HUGE TURN OFF


Turn ons-

Brain's
Desires
Hopes
Dreams
DRIVE

House Talion​(dom male) • May 13, 2020

I want to change the lifestyle from what its taught like on fetlife in order to create a better world for the lifestyle through positive reinforcement to all newbs by ppl that love to help others

IODiCeShOt • May 13, 2020

A good Dom wants the same as the sub when it comes to substance, respect and consideration...just flip the role.

BDSM DOM​(dom male) • May 13, 2020

Turn ons: Communication, honesty, loyalty, respect and sincerity
Turn offs: Lazy, uncooperative, rudeness, disrespectful, and cruel / cold hearted