Am I too crazy to pursue a life partner in crime with BDSM along the way?!

Am I too crazy to pursue a life partner in crime with BDSM a

Sugarmina​(sub female) • Aug 30, 2022

Hi I am a newbie in terms of BDSM in real life with a person/partner. Although I feel like I have the sub essence in my blood since I was a teen, as I have described in my profile. I always have a strong desire to tight myself up with all sorts of belts/ropes when I was only a teenager, especially the ones go deep into my pussy. I would image someone or some people takes over the control and demands me to do all sorts of things and I would feel a strong satisfaction in fulfilling those demands in my "dreamed world". I don't know if anyone has these kinds of experience or I'm just a pretty crazy one.

But in saying that and now that I'm already in my 40', I have never ever really experience BDSM in my real life. I have been hiding myself pretty well and no one really knows this side of me and I think it's because of this, I have never really tried it in reality. But I know how much I crave for it and how much I would love to live this kind of lifestyle, just to have a real good release of EVERYTHING!

And in saying that, what I crave even more is to find a DOM that really knows me, understands where I am coming from and where I am heading to. Someone could worship me just as much as I worship him in our everyday life. it's more of a life partnership plus a strong, healthy DOM/SUB relationship.

I know I may have asked for too much, or I am just too crazy to dream my dream... But anyway, it's my first time really trying to express my crazy intention here, my intention to find my DOM and my intention to find a DOM that we may spend the rest of our life together.

Call me a dreamer if this is unreal.. But I will probably just keep dreaming my dream for just a little longer.

Thank you for accepting me into this community, even though it's just two days, I feel the happiness knowing and talking to many kind hearted people here, to that, I feel forever grateful.

Literate Lycan​(dom male) • Aug 30, 2022

Welcome Sugarmina. You are not crazy and your dreams and desires are very common (from the discussions I have had with many other great friends). Believe it or not, both Dominants and submissives often have the same dreams and desires when entering into a lifestyle. The inner yearning and hunger for more; silently hiding their inner thoughts until they find other like-minded communities where they can freely express themselves and find release.

You deserve to live your best life ever and for many of us, that includes the delicious delicacies of BDSM and a strong, enjoyable dynamic relationship. It's awesome that you are finding the inner courage to enter into the community and learn and live. Definitely take your time getting to know yourself and others. Many of the members of Cage, both Dominant and submissive, are happy to chat and be friends, or give advice and real-life experience.

Have fun!!

balloonkotinsp • Aug 30, 2022

I Definitely wouldn't say crazy. Or perhaps we're all crazy on here to a certain extent anyway. But since you have arrived here recently, as have I, I'm sure you've noticed there are all sorts of different fantasies and kinks out there. I say go for it. I think you'll find that there is someone out there who will be your perfect crazy match. Lol.

primonow • Aug 30, 2022

nothing ventured....nothing gained. safety and going slow coupled with a high amount of communication has been a successful combination for me

Noire{Owned (NH)} • Aug 30, 2022

Hello Lovely!

It’s nice to meet you and welcome to the cage!

As for your post I will be the first to tell you that NO! It’s not unrealistic to ask for a life long partner in bdsm. There are many dynamics here on the cage that have ended in a Happily Ever After situation. Marriage, kids and kinky stuff thrown in the mix.

Of course there are dynamics that may not make it to a happily ever after but that’s what trial and error is for. If your goal in this lifestyle is to have a life long partner that you have an unshakable foundation of trust with. I think that’s an amazing goal.

I too have the intentions of finding a Dom who wants to be in a dynamic with me for the long haul. I vet potential dominants with that goal in mind. So I’m in the same boat as you!

Hopefully after this long ride on the sea has subsided we both get what we are searching for!

Love,
Noire.

simplylaura​(sub female){djinni} • Aug 30, 2022

Hello! I actually found the love of my life on this site and she is both my dominant and fiancee. Sometimes it's hard figuring which "mode" we are in and sometimes I have to pull what I call the "girlfriend" card. It takes communication, so much of it, but it is absolutely possible.

Notely • Aug 30, 2022

Your allowed to be whatever you want just bring your mind with you and safety take your time as time and place for everything. But first be a a friend before anything allow it to grow. Keep growing and learning as much as you can find people that vibe with you.

Estaria​(sub female) • Aug 30, 2022

I love this! I have been lurking on sites for years and most of what I've seen are people NOT wanting a long term relationship. Absolutely nothing wrong with that, but that's just not for me. I'm hoping it's possible....'cause I fantasize about the same things. Having a full life....family, work, life, everything rolled together with bdsm. I want to find a dom that I can trust completely, don't have to question the decisions he's making for us....someone who just gets it....gets me.

Sending good vibes your way.

primonow • Aug 30, 2022

sometimes it's just too hard to get people to interact with you. It's all about the bio or a pic and they never really get to know people. total turn off when they come back to you and want to start talking.

alawey​(sub female){(OWNED BY } • Aug 31, 2022

There is nothing wrong or crazy about it at all. It takes time patience and hard work though. I also meet the love of my life here we have been together since 2017.

There will be bumps in the road . But as long as you go slow and are honest with yourself in what you want and need. Which will help u be honest,and able to share with the other side of the slash . You will find what works for you.