Do You Copy & Paste?

Do You Copy & Paste?

Sweet Minx​(sub female) • Dec 19, 2023

Be honest with me. Those that are seeking a partner, do you have a copy and paste message that you send out?

Do you think this is acceptable or not? I'm bored, can we have a healthy debate? ?

I personally take the time to write something unique and I expect the same effort. But maybe I'm fooling myself. ? Is copy & paste the norm?

K y i v​{Walking} • Dec 19, 2023

Nope ???

Re: Do You Copy & Paste?

IronWorld​(sadist male) • Dec 19, 2023

I've used them in the past for the same reason that I use them for job applications. It's efficient and better than trying to start an original conversation for each profile I see. I had a pretty good one, too. It got me an interested response from one in eight letters sent. Besides, I dont change for each individual submissive, I don't see why I should change my opening dialogue?

I also find the ones that complain the most about copypaste introductions tend to have nothing in their profiles to start conversations with anyway. The complaints I have had tended to derive from an entitlement of investment and effort, which pre-relationship, seems presumptuous.

Re: Do You Copy & Paste?

Sweet Minx​(sub female) • Dec 19, 2023

Hmmmm. And if a sub copies and pastes to you, then I assume that's alright too? The investment of time and effort should be reciprocal should it not? I've never quite considered it entitlement lol

Re: Do You Copy & Paste?

IronWorld​(sadist male) • Dec 19, 2023

Dont hand me that "all things are equal" noise. Men dont have anywhere near the luxury of choice women have in this lifestyle. Men significantly outnumber women in the lifestyle. The only way any rational man could hold onto any level of self worth is to cast as wide a net as possible to as many potential candidates as possible. Or do you honestly expect men to put in some serious emotional effort into each and every message they send out when the vast majority get rejected?

Men aren't entitled to the physical bodies of women. Women aren't entitled to the emotional attention, effort or wealth of men.

Sweet Minx​(sub female) • Dec 20, 2023

I'm not aware of whom outnumbers who or why it really matters. I like to think that you get what you give. It's not about men or women as both genders are capable of the copy & paste. I would also say rejection or no response happens on both sides. Its just strange that if someone wanted the luxury of multiple "candidates" or responses, then why wouldn't they put more thought and effort into it. Maybe the problem isn't the ratio of men to women. That's just my perspective of course.

Ultimately everyone can make their own choice of to copy & paste or not. I'm just a curious cat ?

Noone is entitled to anyones physical body, attention, effort or wealth. But its a 2 way street. Ive had mail where the dom feels entitled to my emotional attention and wealth, even in the first mails lol. But i will always put more effort into someone that is returning it.

Heero​(dom male) • Dec 20, 2023

It depends. There are times when I don't do this at all. But there are also times where I may copy and paste parts of something I've written, and occasionally, I'd tweak that. The longer I'm around, the less I do it.

Now, my first message or approach is never a canned one. I try to make that unique and maybe point out or identify or relate to something that I saw in the person's profile (some people make that HARD). And I would let the convo flow organically.

However, at times I would get a "generic" question, something that I've been asked MANY times before. So many times, that I have worked out a very detailed (and sometimes even succinct!) response. In that case, I think reinventing the wheel is unnecessary and somewhat silly. It is a response that I have crafted over many conversations and did a lot of soul searching to come up with. It's not a canned response per se, it is "a part of me", a part of my soul put to "paper". Or occasionally, it is just a list of some sort. In that case, I would copy and paste the thing. Occasionally making minor tweaks and edits. Cutting out parts not relevant to that conversation, adding and clarifying things that do, etc.

So the answer is most times no, and sometimes I do a hybrid of canned and improv responses.

CageOwner​(dom male) • Dec 20, 2023

Pure copy and paste is a no go. But using parts copy for an introduction yourself (name, age, city, what you are looking for) plus adding a unique part why you are specifically interested in that person is perfectly fine.

From my personal experience, sadly, the effort put in is not correlated to “success”. At all. A big effort way too often is casting pearls before the swine (one of my favorite expressions and title of the book I currently write).

I would go as far as saying putting in a big effort has been negatively correlated to “success”.
My theory is: if you heat up a cheeseburger for someone and they get all excited the summit is near. If you need to cook someone a 4 course meal to get a simple nod (and they wouldn’t have accepted less than that just to nod) you still have a Mount Everest to climb.

IronWorld​(sadist male) • Dec 20, 2023

Because you're the one who requested a healthy debate on the subject. Now you're just dismissing any perspective that doesn't align with your prejudgment on the subject. You feel you're entitled to unique emotional effort on the initial approach of the man. You said it yourself: you respond better to those that do... assuming you can tell the difference. Women respond on a deeper level to the written word. That's why romance novels target a majority female audience (The genre is the industry's top earner with 1.44B per fiscal year). Romantic prose was invented to seduce women and it does its job well.

So if the reality of alternate perspectives don't matter and your return on an initial investment is the only counter, the question becomes: Is your return really worth the investment, and if so how do you quantify it?

Sweet Minx​(sub female) • Dec 20, 2023

The only thing I'm dismissing is that the things you spoke of are gender specific. In my experience they are not but whatever floats your boat.

I dont feel entitied to unique emotional effort. You are putting words in my mouth.

I am someone who generally puts in a lot of effort in everything I do and yes, often my investment is much more than the return. But i don't do it for the "return". I do it for me.