Question For The Alphas Out There

MadPoet • Mar 17, 2024

Agree is so ridiculous reading grown ass people unable to have a decent dialogue, it’s a shame and a total failure in the supposed purpose of the site.

I'mME • Mar 17, 2024

Why ? Because it makes you uncomfortable. This person IS THE PROBLEM. So why not address specifics, instead of speaking in generalities.
People such as MadPoet, are just what I wrote, no ifs, ands, or buts.

Life is uncomfortable sometimes unless one is leading a charmed life.

And there are people such as myself that stand up and speak out. It's part of who I am. This world needs people like us walking about.

To suggest that a thread needs to be shut down is to try and SILENCE individuals.

That is never okay. EVER.

MadPoet • Mar 17, 2024

Yet you still can’t admit being wrong about what I said, funny how you’re not even honest but want to call me a problem. This hilarious

LilSugarFairy​(sub female) • Mar 17, 2024

The lack of self awareness is unreal. You just like to argue to argue? Wanna pull me into this now too? Okay, let's go. First off, you aren't on topic and instead you want to argue to be right instead of being courteous. I don't give a flying ace spade what someone said to you and if it got your panties in a twist. You want to continue this monstrosity because why? It makes you feel better to argue with someone? This thread is TOXIC, that's why it should be closed and YOU are part of the problem that toxicity and I don't even care who is right and who is wrong. Go bicker with MadPoet in a private message instead of forcing everyone to read your rantings.

Now, that's all I'm going to say on the subject. You want to reply, I won't. Because unlike you, I would have liked this thread to actually be of help to someone that maybe would want to read it down the road instead of the absolute shit show it has turned into. So yes, it bloody deserves to be locked if people can't act like considerate individuals and have an adult conversation that isn't oozing with self entitlement or toxic behavior.

MadPoet • Mar 17, 2024

I understands the question and I answered accordingly, some others are the one having serious issues with the response given and that’s clearly not my fault but just another proof of the antagonism towards anyone with a diverse opinion on the matter.

I responded to your comment because you implied something there but never answered my response with clarity, now instead of having a dialogue as an adult (assuming you’re one) you just said that I’m barking, how is that an invitation to dialogue in any way?

lambsone • Mar 17, 2024

Well one thing I can say for this thread, it sure is getting a lot of engagement. Is that the luck of the Irish or what?

MadPoet • Mar 17, 2024

You blocked me from contacting you, without even admitting being offensive and totally wrong about what I said, but as I'm witnessing here is a common behaviour thinking about themselves to be exempt of being at least decent when having an adult conversation in a so called, "welcoming and open minded space", what a joke.

TwinkleEyes • Mar 17, 2024

to that.

Bunnie • Mar 17, 2024

Have you ever had a boss that just thrived, as a person, in their position?

Quite a few years ago I had to step into a managerial role (I know right?! Yes, it was as disastrous as you imagine lol). I knew the job well, and I knew the role well, and I managed… well. And it near killed me. I was so stressed I was dreaming about the job at night!
I’d turn up at work, brave face on, and get the job done. But it was me being someone I’m not. And I *felt* it to my bones. Unfortunately, companies don’t care about whether someone is thriving in a position… they just want results. I got results, so they were happy. But I severely wasn’t. When my boss returned to work, I quit. I was so burned out and so furious at being thrown into that.

However, it made me start to observe differently. How many people were “playing at being leaders” and how many actually naturally thrived on it? I realised that most people seem to “play at” it. And they manage. Well enough to pass. But they don’t thrive on a deep personal level. I have had maybe two bosses in my life that absolutely thrived in their role. The rest seemed… like they were kids playing dress ups. I think the functioning of a work place speaks for itself… some places just bounce with energy, and some tick along meeting what is required. That to me shows a difference between leadership that is working well, or not.

This is kind of how I see Alphas. For some people it is a natural way in which they function. And they naturally bring that energy to a space. But I do believe it’s rare.
As has been widely discussed, because it is seen as a social standing, I think there are many who use it to “dress up” or perhaps have been forced unnaturally (for them) into that role, through necessity.
Self-proclamation is usually a big “tell” for me, like that quote (by someone, somewhere)… if someone has to tell you they are, who are they trying to convince?

Sorry to jump in your thread, even though I don’t identify as an Alpha, @Lambsone. It’s something I have thought about over the years as these types of discussion have arisen, and I’ve observed my thoughts around it shift, so just wanted to share. For me it’s not gender specific, nor BDSM specific. To me it’s much along the same lines as extrovert vs introvert… for the longest time I believed I was extroverted. But I actually came to learn that I had “masked” as one because we live in a society that is geared for extroversion, so it was safer to pretend. The key “tell” for me these days, is whether I feel energised or exhausted. If I’m energised, it’s because I’m being true to myself. If I’m exhausted, it’s because I’m trying to do what I believe is expected, to fit-in.
I think with many of these things, it’s a battle of finding the balance of being true to ourselves vs “fitting-in.”

Re: You are barking up the wrong tree

I'mME • Mar 18, 2024

Actually you started the name calling, liar, and you also said beta was written all through the comment section. I was going to leave that alone but then I caught your directional order at the end of this comment so I opened the can back up.

You do not get to tell me or demand that I don't do something. You shouldn't start BS with ppl you don't know.
You should stay on the porch.