Sex nerds and best friends Billy (billylore.com) and Kate (katesloan.com) talk about all things sex, dating, and masturbating.
How do you maintain a vibrant sex life when tired and in pain all the time? This week Billy interviews Kate about her chronic illness, and the ways she’s used kink to manage it and feel better about it.
Fainting & POTS | Caretaking & Bottoming | Kneeling | Adaptive Products | Chronic Pain | Weed | Flexibility & Muscle Strength | Queening Chairs | Risk vs. Reward | Laundry | Energy Budgeting | Self-Blame | Fatigue & Sleepy Sex | Broken & Lucky | Dominance | Princess Treatment | Hell on Wheels & Kneeling in Spirit | Resentment & Guilt | Service | Chastity & Denial | Bondage & Pressure | Sadomasochism | Good Pain vs. Bad Pain | Disclosing | Intoxication Concerns | Excessive Caution
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
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Why are we so drawn to sexuality as a discussion topic and field of study, and how are people in our industry treated differently than those with more “vanilla” jobs? This week, we examine the intersections of sex and professionalism!
Why Sex? | Self-Discovery & Freedom | Frivolity & Familiarity | Projection | Professionalism | Beacon of Permission | What Do You Want? | Traits | Poker Face | SAR (Sexual Attitude Reassessment) | Know Thyself
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
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What is “competence kink,” and why is someone being good at things such a common turn-on? This week, we discuss our favorite competencies in others and in ourselves, and what makes them so hot.
Is It a Kink? | Confidence | Our Favorite Competencies | Passion | Quickness & Focus | Planning | Our Competencies | Emotional Intelligence | Soft Skills & Bottoming | Bravery of Vulnerability | Transferrable to Sex? | Listening & Paying Attention | Being Bad at Things | Kink Scenes | Distraction Play | Confident Headspace | Competency Wishlist | Dancing
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
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Is real-life romance anything like a Hollywood romantic comedy? This week we’re discussing portrayals of love and relationships in fiction, and what makes a love story feel real and grounded, versus hollow and schmaltzy.
The Invite (2026) | I Want Your Sex (2026) | Relationship Movies | High Fidelity (2000) | When Harry Met Sally… (1989) | Barriers to Union | Love Triangles | The F Word/What If (2013) | Threesome (1994) | Sanctuary (2022) | Skylight (2024) | Friends-to-Lovers | Plus One (2019) | Romantic Comedies vs. Romantic Dramas | What Feels Romantic? | Sleeping with Other People (2015) | A Lot Like Love (2005) | Matt and Mara (2024) | I Love You, Man (2009) | Fantasy vs. Reality | A Perfect Pair | Say Anything… (1989) | Not Frivolous | Pillion (2025) | Underrepresented Aspects of Love | Non-Monogamy | Bob & Carol & Ted & Alice (1969) | Healthy Conflict | Caretaking | Queer Relationships | The Birdcage (1996) | Fire Island (2022) | Heated Rivalry | Expectations | Instant Attraction | Sexual Difficulties
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
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How do you maintain a friendship with someone who lives far away? We’ve done it for over a decade now, so this week we’re sharing our best advice on long-distance friendships!
Romantic vs. Platonic | Where We’ve Met Them | Two Cities | Prepping to Leave | A Reason to Talk | “Thought of You!” | Frequency & Consistency | “Let’s Be Friends!” | Group Hangs | Real-Time Communication | Unfiltered Reactions | PowerPoint Party | Activities | Intentionality | ADHD & Chronic Illness | Lateness | Energy Limitations | Note-Taking | Benefits | Outside Perspective | Travel
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
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“Meeting the parents” can be stressful for everyone involved, so this week we’re giving our best advice on it, including from a queer and polyamorous perspective!
Introducing the BF/Metamour | Grokking Polyamory | “Ohh, That’s Why You’re Like This” | When To Do It | Gender Competency | Jumping the Gun | What to Pre-Seed | Going Bad vs. Going Good | Escape Plan | When to Stand Down | Etiquette | Respect | Coming Out As Poly | Parents Dislike Them
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
We’re answering more questions about lube this week, including which ones are best for travel, which drugstore lubes are actually decent, whether you should bring your own lube to a sex party, and more!
Dill Pickle Lube | Travel-Friendly Lubes | Uberlube Good to Go | Good Clean Love Almost Naked | Astroglide Silicone | Astroglide Spray ’n Glide | Good Clean Love Hint of Mint | Judging Someone’s Lube | Better Than Baseline | Non-Standard Usages | Condom | Sex Party | Playing Without Lube | Food or Drink | Gender Affirmation | Lube Accessories | Automatic Lube Dispenser | Dame Grip | Warming It Up | Lube Shooters
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
This week, Kate and her wife mb interview Jessie Nelson, inventor of the SoleHole, a new foot fetish toy for couples that Kate recently reviewed. Jessie told us all about how he designed, prototyped and launched this innovative toy!
Mobility Issues | Artistic & Electrical Background | “Aha” Moment | Prototypes | Stretchy Band | Tightness | The Name | Balldo | Claustrophobic Mask | Launch & Reception | Surprising Reactions | Sizing | Non-Fetishists | Lube | FuckWater | Grinder | Approaching Manufacturers | Purple | Vibration | Other Ideas | Plug of War | Other Foot Toys | Social Media | Shame | Cultural Shift | Business Partner
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
Lubricant is a basic part of sex for many people, but there are actually a lot of considerations that go into choosing a good one. This week, we discuss our experiences with lube, and give advice on using it!
Our First Lubes | System JO | Bottle Design | Initial Apprehensions | Blossom Organics | Must-Have Accessory | Spit as Lube | Textural Differences | Sliquid Silk | Sliquid Organics Gel | Sliquid Sassy | Sutil Rich | Uberlube | Alternate Uses | Monistat Chafing Relief Gel | Her Highness THC Oil | Warming & Cooling | A Shortcut | Beginner Tips | Oil-Based Lubes | Flavored Lubes | Sliquid Swirl | LubeLife Dill Pickle Lube | Numbing Lubes | Promescent Delay Spray | THC/CBD Lubes
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
Hope your Pride month has been lovely so far! We’re celebrating by discussing some of our favorite queer media and what makes it feel authentically queer.
Queer Friends | Sex Representation | Sexual Communication | Talking About Being Queer | Homophobia & Coming Out | The Tragedy of Heterosexuality by Jane Ward | Leviticus (2026) | I Saw the TV Glow (2024) | Teenage Sex and Death at Camp Miasma (2026) | Blue Moon (2025) | Present Laughter (2019) | Handsome Devil (2016) | No Ordinary Man (2020) | Rope (1948) | The Favourite (2018) | The Handmaiden (2016) | Kissing Jessica Stein (2001) | Forbidden Love (1992) | Cloudburst (2011) | D.E.B.S. (2004) | Angels in America miniseries | Fellow Travelers | Myra Breckinridge (1970) | Funeral Parade of Roses (1969) | Queens At Heart (1967) | Some Like It Hot (1959) | Sylvia Scarlett (1935) | Boy! What a Girl! (1947) | Red, White & Royal Blue | One Last Stop | I Kissed Shara Wheeler | The Pairing | I Hope We Choose Love | Detransition, Baby | Ace | TAZ: Petals to the Metal | 99 Erics | Love in a F*cked-Up World | The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo | On the Move | The Wolf Suit | This Is How You Lose the Time War | In Universes | Wayfarer series | The F*ggots and Their Friends Between Revolutions | Sondheim & Magnetic Fields
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
We’ve got some interesting new fetishes from the internet to discuss this week, including jetsetter rimjobs, faux pregnancy, women with apples for heads, and more!
Cunnilingus & Airplanes | Mile High Club | “Dating a Porn Star” | “Happy Boners” & Wedding Planning | Public Pregnancy Play | Roleplaying as Historical Figures | Pussy Degradation | Headless Women
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
Happy Pride month, everybody! This week, we discuss our history with Pride, our current feelings on it, and tips for newbies – and we also recommend some of our favorite gay movies.
Year-Round vs. One Month | Our Pride Feelings | Self-Expression | Body-Positivity | Queer History & Art | BloodSisters (1995) | Word is Out (1977) | Framing Agnes (2022) | P.S. Burn This Letter Please (2020) | Pride (2014) | The Fathers Project (2020) | The Birdcage (1996) | Brokeback Mountain (2005) | Portrait of a Lady on Fire (2019) | How to Survive a Plague (2012) | Heightened Scrutiny (2025) | Who’s Allowed at Pride? | Gatekeeping | Cops & Corporations | The Actual Parade | Planning Your Pride | Outfits
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
This week, we’re answering listener questions on a variety of topics, from squirting to piercings to fetishes!
TMI | Penile Squirting Study | “Gush” by Kate Sinclaire | Pierced Dicks | AB/DL | Regression & Play | Blog Post on Diaper Play | Duelling Penises | Public Sex Locations | Fetish, or Me? | Ace-Spectrum Fetishists
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
Pet play is a popular kink that has spawned many interesting subcultures, so this week we’re talking about our own experiences roleplaying as cats, dogs, and more.
Kittens & Bunnies | Headspace | No Need to Speak | Primal Play | Physical Limitations | Dignified vs. Gross/Wild | Animal Archetypes | Power & Autonomy | Pigs | Horses | Jungle Cats | Turtles | Fantasy Creatures | Whiskers (1997) | Unicorns | Sex | S&M | Toppy Pets | Kink Subcultures
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
Makeup is an important part of many people’s self-expression, both in and out of the bedroom – so this week, we discuss how cosmetics intersect with kink, gender, queerness, and more!
Eyeliner | “Wanna Do Our Makeup Together?” | Origin Story | Self-Care Ritual | Artistic Expression | “I Like You Better Without Makeup” | Male Gaze | For You vs. For Others | Deciding on a Look | Queers vs. Straights | Anastasia Dipbrow Pomade | Kink Headspaces | Makeup in Scenes | Lipstick Problem vs. Brain Problem | First-Timer Tips | Skincare | Makeup Longevity | Blowjob Lipsticks | Maybelline Matte Ink Lipstick | MAC Liquidlast Eyeliner | Smeared Makeup | Forced Makeover | Red Lipstick | Revlon Fire & Ice + Cherries in the Snow | MAC Russian Red
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
Learning about your sexuality is a lifelong journey, so this week we discussed the process of acquiring/discovering kinks that are new to you and exploring them for the first time.
Discovering vs. Creating | Recurring Themes | Taboo & Novelty | Expectation vs. Reality | Craving Newness | Resistance to Change | Why Is It Hot? | 101 Kinky Things Even You Can Do | Starting Solo | Beginner-Friendly Scenes | Budget Constraints | Shame & Cringe | Self-Judgment & Guilt | Archetypes & Metaphors | Our Newest Kinks
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
Happy belated 4/20! We’re celebrating as we always do: by getting high and answering listener-submitted hypothetical questions about sex, dating, and masturbating.
The Last Prisoner Project | Time Travel | Tim Travers and the Time Traveler’s Paradox (2024) | Nirvanna the Band the Show the Movie (2025) | About Time (2013) | Groundhog Day (1993) | Palm Springs (2020) | Time Travel Sex Ethics | Meet Cute (2022) | A Christmas Carol | A World Without Anal | “I Wanna Breed That Person” | Forced Non-Binarization | Sentient Sex Toys | Post-Orgasm Truth Serum
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
This week we’re discussing metamours, i.e. our partners’ partners – partly because Kate’s recently been on some dates with one of hers!
Defining ‘Metamour’ | Kitchen Table vs. Garden Party | Comparison | Disclosure | Privacy vs. Secrecy | Growth & Risk | Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell | What to Share | Advice from Partners | Metamour-Like Relationships | Different Facets of Oneself | Meeting a Metamour
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
This week, Billy interviews Calvin Hauer, a sex-positive therapist based in Minneapolis, about being out as queer/kinky and how that can affect the therapy process for both clients and practitioners.
Ethics of Self-Disclosure | In Community with Clients | Being Out as Kinky | Erotic Transference & Counter-Transference | Unequal By Design | Kink-Aware vs. Kink-Experienced | The Leather Couch | Kink Origins | Pathologizing Kink | Authenticity | Fisting | Clients Disclosing Kinks | The PLISSIT Model | Hiring & Firing Therapists
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
We’re busting more sex toy myths this week, including the infamous medical origin story of the vibrator, orgasm guarantees, and a dearth of toys for dicks!
Vibrator Invention Myth | Hysteria (2011) | The Technology of Orgasm by Rachel Maines | Buzz by Hallie Lieberman | No Toys for Dicks? | Only for Single People | Orgasm Guarantees | Different Toys | “Anything’s a Dildo If You’re Brave Enough” | Funkit Toys NoFrilldos
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
There are countless myths and misconceptions about sex toys, and this week we try to set the record straight on a few of them!
Vibrator Numbness | Vibe as Scapegoat | Rendered Obsolete | Shere Hite Book | The Hite Report | Bigger = Better? | Vibrations on the Nose | Stretched Out | Toy Cleaner
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
Is large penetration a goal worth aspiring to? This week we discuss our evolving feelings on fisting and other forms of XXL penetration!
Current Feelings | Can Anyone Be Fisted? | Journey vs. Destination | Fist vs. Fingers | Njoy Eleven | Vixen Gambler | Hand Weakness/Pain | Emotional Effects | Guts Rearranged | Penis Size | Unicorn Collaborators Hand Harness | Fist-Shaped Dildos | Vixen Randy | Epiphora’s Randy Diary | Sliquid Silk | J-Lube
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
There are always interesting new fetishes to discover! This week we’re discussing some unusual kinks we’ve heard about lately, from latex-sheathed blowjobs to cringe masturbation to being “friendzoned.”
“Chasing” Someone Unavailable | Hands | Condom’ed Blowjobs | Skyn Condoms | Flavored Lubes by Sliquid, Wicked, & LubeLife | Being Friendzoned | Cajoling a Boyfriend Into Sex | Denial Kink | Cringe | “Unattractive People” | Webbing Between Fingers | Fisting & Hand Pics
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
Giving advice can get tricky when you’re polyamorous (or just prone to messy romantic drama), so this week we’re offering more advice on giving advice!
No Sex on a Date | Will Not Advise | Criticism vs. Praise | Parenting Advice | Authority & Influence | Advising a Partner | Too Much Bias | Mad at a Metamour | People Who Don’t Take Advice | Sex & Kink Coaching
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
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We love giving advice, so this week we’re advising you on advising – how and when to give helpful advice, the best ways to ask for it, and the common mistakes we’ve made in these areas.
Different Dataset | Context | Solicited | Vulnerability | Commands | Asking Questions | Mental State | Pointing Out Patterns | Asking for Advice | Phrasing the Ask | Emotional Validation | Empathy or Strategy? | How to Take Advice
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.