Sex nerds and best friends Billy (billylore.com) and Kate (katesloan.com) talk about all things sex, dating, and masturbating.
We’re answering more questions about lube this week, including which ones are best for travel, which drugstore lubes are actually decent, whether you should bring your own lube to a sex party, and more!
Dill Pickle Lube | Travel-Friendly Lubes | Uberlube Good to Go | Good Clean Love Almost Naked | Astroglide Silicone | Astroglide Spray ’n Glide | Good Clean Love Hint of Mint | Judging Someone’s Lube | Better Than Baseline | Non-Standard Usages | Condom | Sex Party | Playing Without Lube | Food or Drink | Gender Affirmation | Lube Accessories | Automatic Lube Dispenser | Dame Grip | Warming It Up | Lube Shooters
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
This week, Kate and her wife mb interview Jessie Nelson, inventor of the SoleHole, a new foot fetish toy for couples that Kate recently reviewed. Jessie told us all about how he designed, prototyped and launched this innovative toy!
Mobility Issues | Artistic & Electrical Background | “Aha” Moment | Prototypes | Stretchy Band | Tightness | The Name | Balldo | Claustrophobic Mask | Launch & Reception | Surprising Reactions | Sizing | Non-Fetishists | Lube | FuckWater | Grinder | Approaching Manufacturers | Purple | Vibration | Other Ideas | Plug of War | Other Foot Toys | Social Media | Shame | Cultural Shift | Business Partner
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
Lubricant is a basic part of sex for many people, but there are actually a lot of considerations that go into choosing a good one. This week, we discuss our experiences with lube, and give advice on using it!
Our First Lubes | System JO | Bottle Design | Initial Apprehensions | Blossom Organics | Must-Have Accessory | Spit as Lube | Textural Differences | Sliquid Silk | Sliquid Organics Gel | Sliquid Sassy | Sutil Rich | Uberlube | Alternate Uses | Monistat Chafing Relief Gel | Her Highness THC Oil | Warming & Cooling | A Shortcut | Beginner Tips | Oil-Based Lubes | Flavored Lubes | Sliquid Swirl | LubeLife Dill Pickle Lube | Numbing Lubes | Promescent Delay Spray | THC/CBD Lubes
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
Hope your Pride month has been lovely so far! We’re celebrating by discussing some of our favorite queer media and what makes it feel authentically queer.
Queer Friends | Sex Representation | Sexual Communication | Talking About Being Queer | Homophobia & Coming Out | The Tragedy of Heterosexuality by Jane Ward | Leviticus (2026) | I Saw the TV Glow (2024) | Teenage Sex and Death at Camp Miasma (2026) | Blue Moon (2025) | Present Laughter (2019) | Handsome Devil (2016) | No Ordinary Man (2020) | Rope (1948) | The Favourite (2018) | The Handmaiden (2016) | Kissing Jessica Stein (2001) | Forbidden Love (1992) | Cloudburst (2011) | D.E.B.S. (2004) | Angels in America miniseries | Fellow Travelers | Myra Breckinridge (1970) | Funeral Parade of Roses (1969) | Queens At Heart (1967) | Some Like It Hot (1959) | Sylvia Scarlett (1935) | Boy! What a Girl! (1947) | Red, White & Royal Blue | One Last Stop | I Kissed Shara Wheeler | The Pairing | I Hope We Choose Love | Detransition, Baby | Ace | TAZ: Petals to the Metal | 99 Erics | Love in a F*cked-Up World | The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo | On the Move | The Wolf Suit | This Is How You Lose the Time War | In Universes | Wayfarer series | The F*ggots and Their Friends Between Revolutions | Sondheim & Magnetic Fields
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
We’ve got some interesting new fetishes from the internet to discuss this week, including jetsetter rimjobs, faux pregnancy, women with apples for heads, and more!
Cunnilingus & Airplanes | Mile High Club | “Dating a Porn Star” | “Happy Boners” & Wedding Planning | Public Pregnancy Play | Roleplaying as Historical Figures | Pussy Degradation | Headless Women
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
Happy Pride month, everybody! This week, we discuss our history with Pride, our current feelings on it, and tips for newbies – and we also recommend some of our favorite gay movies.
Year-Round vs. One Month | Our Pride Feelings | Self-Expression | Body-Positivity | Queer History & Art | BloodSisters (1995) | Word is Out (1977) | Framing Agnes (2022) | P.S. Burn This Letter Please (2020) | Pride (2014) | The Fathers Project (2020) | The Birdcage (1996) | Brokeback Mountain (2005) | Portrait of a Lady on Fire (2019) | How to Survive a Plague (2012) | Heightened Scrutiny (2025) | Who’s Allowed at Pride? | Gatekeeping | Cops & Corporations | The Actual Parade | Planning Your Pride | Outfits
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
This week, we’re answering listener questions on a variety of topics, from squirting to piercings to fetishes!
TMI | Penile Squirting Study | “Gush” by Kate Sinclaire | Pierced Dicks | AB/DL | Regression & Play | Blog Post on Diaper Play | Duelling Penises | Public Sex Locations | Fetish, or Me? | Ace-Spectrum Fetishists
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
Pet play is a popular kink that has spawned many interesting subcultures, so this week we’re talking about our own experiences roleplaying as cats, dogs, and more.
Kittens & Bunnies | Headspace | No Need to Speak | Primal Play | Physical Limitations | Dignified vs. Gross/Wild | Animal Archetypes | Power & Autonomy | Pigs | Horses | Jungle Cats | Turtles | Fantasy Creatures | Whiskers (1997) | Unicorns | Sex | S&M | Toppy Pets | Kink Subcultures
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
Makeup is an important part of many people’s self-expression, both in and out of the bedroom – so this week, we discuss how cosmetics intersect with kink, gender, queerness, and more!
Eyeliner | “Wanna Do Our Makeup Together?” | Origin Story | Self-Care Ritual | Artistic Expression | “I Like You Better Without Makeup” | Male Gaze | For You vs. For Others | Deciding on a Look | Queers vs. Straights | Anastasia Dipbrow Pomade | Kink Headspaces | Makeup in Scenes | Lipstick Problem vs. Brain Problem | First-Timer Tips | Skincare | Makeup Longevity | Blowjob Lipsticks | Maybelline Matte Ink Lipstick | MAC Liquidlast Eyeliner | Smeared Makeup | Forced Makeover | Red Lipstick | Revlon Fire & Ice + Cherries in the Snow | MAC Russian Red
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
Learning about your sexuality is a lifelong journey, so this week we discussed the process of acquiring/discovering kinks that are new to you and exploring them for the first time.
Discovering vs. Creating | Recurring Themes | Taboo & Novelty | Expectation vs. Reality | Craving Newness | Resistance to Change | Why Is It Hot? | 101 Kinky Things Even You Can Do | Starting Solo | Beginner-Friendly Scenes | Budget Constraints | Shame & Cringe | Self-Judgment & Guilt | Archetypes & Metaphors | Our Newest Kinks
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
Happy belated 4/20! We’re celebrating as we always do: by getting high and answering listener-submitted hypothetical questions about sex, dating, and masturbating.
The Last Prisoner Project | Time Travel | Tim Travers and the Time Traveler’s Paradox (2024) | Nirvanna the Band the Show the Movie (2025) | About Time (2013) | Groundhog Day (1993) | Palm Springs (2020) | Time Travel Sex Ethics | Meet Cute (2022) | A Christmas Carol | A World Without Anal | “I Wanna Breed That Person” | Forced Non-Binarization | Sentient Sex Toys | Post-Orgasm Truth Serum
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
This week we’re discussing metamours, i.e. our partners’ partners – partly because Kate’s recently been on some dates with one of hers!
Defining ‘Metamour’ | Kitchen Table vs. Garden Party | Comparison | Disclosure | Privacy vs. Secrecy | Growth & Risk | Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell | What to Share | Advice from Partners | Metamour-Like Relationships | Different Facets of Oneself | Meeting a Metamour
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
This week, Billy interviews Calvin Hauer, a sex-positive therapist based in Minneapolis, about being out as queer/kinky and how that can affect the therapy process for both clients and practitioners.
Ethics of Self-Disclosure | In Community with Clients | Being Out as Kinky | Erotic Transference & Counter-Transference | Unequal By Design | Kink-Aware vs. Kink-Experienced | The Leather Couch | Kink Origins | Pathologizing Kink | Authenticity | Fisting | Clients Disclosing Kinks | The PLISSIT Model | Hiring & Firing Therapists
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
We’re busting more sex toy myths this week, including the infamous medical origin story of the vibrator, orgasm guarantees, and a dearth of toys for dicks!
Vibrator Invention Myth | Hysteria (2011) | The Technology of Orgasm by Rachel Maines | Buzz by Hallie Lieberman | No Toys for Dicks? | Only for Single People | Orgasm Guarantees | Different Toys | “Anything’s a Dildo If You’re Brave Enough” | Funkit Toys NoFrilldos
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
There are countless myths and misconceptions about sex toys, and this week we try to set the record straight on a few of them!
Vibrator Numbness | Vibe as Scapegoat | Rendered Obsolete | Shere Hite Book | The Hite Report | Bigger = Better? | Vibrations on the Nose | Stretched Out | Toy Cleaner
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
Is large penetration a goal worth aspiring to? This week we discuss our evolving feelings on fisting and other forms of XXL penetration!
Current Feelings | Can Anyone Be Fisted? | Journey vs. Destination | Fist vs. Fingers | Njoy Eleven | Vixen Gambler | Hand Weakness/Pain | Emotional Effects | Guts Rearranged | Penis Size | Unicorn Collaborators Hand Harness | Fist-Shaped Dildos | Vixen Randy | Epiphora’s Randy Diary | Sliquid Silk | J-Lube
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
There are always interesting new fetishes to discover! This week we’re discussing some unusual kinks we’ve heard about lately, from latex-sheathed blowjobs to cringe masturbation to being “friendzoned.”
“Chasing” Someone Unavailable | Hands | Condom’ed Blowjobs | Skyn Condoms | Flavored Lubes by Sliquid, Wicked, & LubeLife | Being Friendzoned | Cajoling a Boyfriend Into Sex | Denial Kink | Cringe | “Unattractive People” | Webbing Between Fingers | Fisting & Hand Pics
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
Giving advice can get tricky when you’re polyamorous (or just prone to messy romantic drama), so this week we’re offering more advice on giving advice!
No Sex on a Date | Will Not Advise | Criticism vs. Praise | Parenting Advice | Authority & Influence | Advising a Partner | Too Much Bias | Mad at a Metamour | People Who Don’t Take Advice | Sex & Kink Coaching
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
We love giving advice, so this week we’re advising you on advising – how and when to give helpful advice, the best ways to ask for it, and the common mistakes we’ve made in these areas.
Different Dataset | Context | Solicited | Vulnerability | Commands | Asking Questions | Mental State | Pointing Out Patterns | Asking for Advice | Phrasing the Ask | Emotional Validation | Empathy or Strategy? | How to Take Advice
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
Happy (belated) Valentine’s Day! This week we celebrated by answering listener questions about love and romance.
Crying on V-Day | Romance vs. Friendship | Curiosity & Merging | Codependency | “One True Love” | Dean Spade Essay | “Be Mine” | Polyamorous Valentine’s | Social Media | “The One That Got Away”
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
We used to talk about spanking all the time, but is it still one of our favorite kinks? This week we discuss our current feelings on impact play!
Jump-Scared by Bruises | Spanking vs. Beating | Jillian Keenan Videos | Bastinado | Random Punching | Topping | Evolving Relationship | The Artist & the Pervert | Non-Consensual Spanking | Not a Punishment | Thuddy vs. Stingy | Chronic Pain | Implements | Wood vs. Leather | Weal & Breech | London Tanners Strap | Bookweight | Miss Rose Paddles | LilfoxToybox | Holo Leather | Purple Passion | Pickup Play | Emotional Risk | Intoxicants | Communication Tools
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
This week, we chat with dating coach/columnist (and former pickup artist) Harris O’Malley, a.k.a. Doctor NerdLove, whose work we’ve admired for a long time! He gave us some advice on flirting, dating, conversational skills, and more.
Pickup Artistry | Dark Night of the Soul | Fear of Rejection | What Even Is Flirting? | Bad at Flirting – Please Be Blunt | Neurodivergent Nerds | Rules vs. Vibes | Disarmingly Honest | Asking No Questions | The Question Game | Breaking the Touch Barrier | Sex(y) Conversations | Staying in the Moment | Improv Skills | Building Social Momentum | What If? (2013) | Sleeping with Other People (2015) | A Nice Indian Boy (2024) | Do As We Say, Not As They Did
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
Romantic yearning can be deeply painful, but it’s also kinda hot and fun. This week we discuss our experiences with this unique emotion in contexts like long-distance relationships and unrequited love.
Is It Good? | General vs. Specific | Desire | Defining ‘Yearning’ | Emotional Sadomasochism | Long-Distance | Enjoying It | Creative Outlet | Incels | Heated Rivalry | Gendered Tropes | Men’s Emotions | Yandere | Taking Initiative | Neediness | Turning It Up or Down | Sexual Yearning | Receiving End
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
This week, we discuss our favorite sexual fantasies of 2025, the sex & dating goals we set for ourselves last year, and our new goals for 2026.
Fantasies | Sex Robots | Work Sex | Forced to Be Bored | Safer Sex | Anonymous Sex | Femdom & Dorky Virgins | Toronto vs. New York | Double Penetration | Sex Nerd Workspace | Sex For Fun | Communicating Better | Socializing | Sex Therapy School | Queer Media Archiving | Good Gender Feelings | Questions on Dates | New Goals | Non-Sex Hobbies | PIV Orgasms | Love | The Internet | Beginner’s Mind
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.
Happy new year! This week we’re reflecting on the biggest changes in our sex & dating lives in 2025, the sex toys we loved most, and the weirdest sex we had all year.
Rest & Movies | Overall Changes | Hookups | Libido Troubles | Horny 4 Intimacy | Living Together | Low-Dose Naltrexone | Emotional Energy | Monogamous Crushes | New Things | BJ Buddy | Random Act of Muff Dive | Belly Stuff | Fingered in a Park | De-Escalation | Tail-Fucking | PIV & CBT | We-Vibe Tango X | Doc Johnson Mochi Stroker | Lovense Lush Mini | Magic Wand Waterproof | Lelo Switch | Pre-Breakup Sex | Best/Weirdest Sex
Credits:
Music by PROTODOME
Artwork by Addison Finch
Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.