Have you ever been on the edge of change and you could sense that something big was coming?
That's how I feel right now.
I feel the shifts around me.
I felt so strongly to share this today.
It's not just in one area of my life at the moment it feels like the shift is coming from every direction moving me forward. It is exciting and scary at the same time. I was told by a very close friend of mine that he possibly has feelings for someone in his past. I am deeply, genuinely, 100% happy for him and simultaneously realised that although our friendship is not over, it will definitely shift and change. He is somebody who I have consistently talked with, who has consistently listened to me, and even though he is not someone that most people would consider intelligent he has the biggest heart but has had unfortunate life circumstances. So for me right now I feel happy that he has settled a little bit and also that I should in myself move forward. As much as I love his friendship and cherish it, I don't need that constant support from him anymore so our dynamic has moved from deeply needing each other to communicate or work things out, to genuine love and friendship but with space to be ourselves.
Trying to start a business and possibly having my rental home sold, all indicates to me that it's time for me to move forward. It would be easy to let yourself think these are all negative situations but for me they feel very healthy and they feel like a sign of greater things to come. That I have outgrown the space that I'm in physically, emotionally, mentally and even in my friendships. All of them moving to a deeper consciousness, a deeper type of connection, especially my friendships where they have moved from a need to a genuine love. So that constant contact is not required it is always there if I need it but all of these elements leave me in a very open, positive excited state.
I don't know where I will be at the end of the year, I don't even know where I will be in a month's time. I'm hopeful that I am on my way to finding a new home where I can settle and create a base (because although I am grateful to live here for the past month I have been a bit fed up with living in an old run down home. Wanting to be closer to the beach). I'm hoping that my business has taking charge (because it has to and I will work hard to get it there) and I have a steady flow of income and by the end of the year I know but I will be proud of how far I have come.
I knew that 2020 was going to be the most challenging year all the way back in January but also the most progressive and fulfilling year for myself. All of these challenges that have come my way, I have learnt to accept with gratitude, to not see them as negatives, but to try and grow beyond that to see where they are trying to shift me to be. Growth never comes from staying still and I feel that this year my feet have hardly touch the ground and I'm only halfway through lol.
This year for me is significant and I can feel it in every part of myself, empowering and challenging me on every turn.
Ive learnt not to believe in coincidences or in wrong timing. Everything happens for a reason and sometimes it just takes time for us to understand what the lesson is, or why we were put in that situation. If our relationship doesn't work out it's not due to bad timing, it's because it wasn't going to work in the first place and there is something greater intended for us. If I come across something that I have been considering in my life for sometime (like wanting a house a bit nicer), I don't see that as a consequence I see that as a sign.
So I'm raising my glass to challenges and the change that is coming my way. Sitting patiently with an open 💜 to receive it.
