I will never understand the people who just catch a random picture or one post out of context and assume I am a submissive.
Don't come out of the nothingness to sexually objectify me it is the surest way to never have access to me.
I am a above all sexually a demisexual so unless you have won my utmost respect and admiration I want nothing sexual to do with you.
Additionally I have never felt an attraction to cis het guys.
I am more comfortable with people who have been marginalized for their gender and or sex because it gives me a point of relation. This helps because I don't have to explain much of what I feel.
As an Intersex gender fluid person with moments of extreme gender dysphoria I don't think most people who haven't felt that on some level can understand. Believe me I am doing cis het men a favor by not showing a sexual or kink interest in them because we are as far from compatible as any two people can be.
As for the submissive point I am a switch but that doesn't mean I will sub for anyone.
More then switch I really am simply a service oriented person who aims to please.
If I care about someone or a person who earnestly wants my attention I will be glad to play with them if I deem them as trustworthy.
If they want me to run needles in their body, beat them till they scream, or sensually play with their body with my fire or massage kits these are just some of the ways I dom others.
Yet for the truly special, the kind of person that I find enjoyable and fully trustworthy I might kneel before you and plead for you to share your joy with me.
But if I didn't ask or show an interest odds are I'm not into you playing with me.
Note I don't find BDSM sexual in and of itself.
For me kink doesn't mean sex unless you are my partner and that is an expressed part of the dynamic.
This shouldn't be difficult to understand.
The overall dynamic I am most likely to bottom for is rope. I have a novice skill set in rope so I can't do it myself yet and those who are really notable to me I am quite happy to let them tie me up drag me in a harness hog tie me suspend me it's such a joy.
I am confident enough to admit fully I'm a rope bunny 🐇 aint nothing to it (shaking cotton tail.) But does that mean I want every individual who ever tied a knot to tie me up?
Of course not, if I haven't shown an interest in your skills then generally it's safe to assume I have decided we wouldn't be a good fit or I don't know you well enough to feel comfortable with you.
If you wanna know how to get my positive attention? Get to know me as a person. It's not a pickup line, a photo, or some bragging that gets my interest.
Be a genuine person who has interesting things to say that make my heart feel incomplete without your presence in my life.
In my opinion that's kinky.