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11 months ago. November 30, 2023 at 3:17 PM

When I met the Master that became my very first owner in a BDSM situation I felt very early that he deserved to be obeyed and pleased, long before I even understood what that meant. This is a difficult feeling for me to have felt and use as a measure of who I submit to and serve in the future. Perhaps that is too high an expectation. 

chattel​(sub female) - Perhaps, but should a Dom not be able to inspire submission and obedience in a slave?
11 months ago
chattel​(sub female) - Perhaps my perception is skewed by the number of inquiries from Dom people whose primary kink is sadism or extreme pet play which are limits in my profile.
11 months ago
StrictGentleman​(dom male) - Thank you for sharing the feelings from your perspective as a submissive/slave. I agree that a leader must be able to have a vision and inspire a submission. However, looking back with fondness at the first dynamic and expect subsequent ones to follow is for me a mistake. It’s like wanting to relive the first love or when one losing the virginity. Yes, we have firsts experiences in life but we cannot be the same naive inexperienced person again. My advice is for you to keep your heart open, keep the same willingness to learn and excitement of fulfilling even deeper needs within you, being by serving fully to a new Master or growing as a person. Just do not allow yourself to be conditioned by experience into a hard shell and judging potential Masters looking for the smallest flaws, you didn’t know better that first time, was it helpful then? ;)
11 months ago
Bunnie - Comment deleted by poster.
11 months ago
Bunnie - I was going to say originally, don’t drop your standards. But I realised that would have been hypocritical because I did. And it lead me to an experience I would never have expected.
So now I think I’d say… go by how you feel with the person. If there are things you’re willing to be flexible on, see what happens.
11 months ago
chattel​(sub female) - Learning from your oen error is a good thing. Sharing your error so others can learn from it without making the same mistake is a great thing. It's not hypocritical at all. Thank you for sharing.
11 months ago
A philosopher - Hi 👋
11 months ago
Moonstompskin - Hello to you Chattel! I hope the weekend is finding you well. I’m a recent expat of Fet, and trying other sites. Everything is a work in progress for the month I got a timeout 😈😂

Anyways i stumbled across you, and your posts and you’re an absolute prize of a person. In regards to your post. A dom is just any other person until you on a quantum scale

Connect. Just like meeting someone at a munch or at work etc. Usually there’s that gut feeling, hesitation, or even apprehension.

You know as well as I do, you’ve walked away from someone ( as I have) goin “ nope not for me” even though everything tick most or all of the boxes.. you just know.

I feel, and I could be entirely on another plane of existence with this direction lol, that you just got really lucky in the first go, and everything clicked.

You should, and have every right, to compare everyone to that dynamic. That’s your safety bar, and tbh there’s a metric shit ton of “fake doms”, and “primal/alpha males” where hereby forth words in quotes are interchangeable with the word predator(y).

Myself personally won’t even insult your intellect and valuable time by saying I’m a well versed Dominant. I dabbled in my early days, then I fell in love and got married to a vanilla…. I’m rusty ( not my name cause of my hair) in the scene and I find myself in a strange state and a Nubian once again.

You know Chattel best. If it doesn’t have that je ne sais quoi… the dom is then doubling down trying to either force the dynamic, or woe is him, protect his fragile ego and image. Which in MY (again can be horridly wrong) opinion is not SSC for either party.

His frustration could put you at risk, and obviously he would be slightly going insane 😝

Which isn’t consensual for both.

I hope with every fiber in my being that I didn’t come across as a ballbag lol

Just wanted to swing by and say hi to a bad ass neighbor… ish. I hope you have a killer weekend and laugh at me in your reply. Have a good one
11 months ago
A philosopher - The ❤️❤️
10 months ago
Cambion - You are definitely a woman i want to move into my apartment immediately.
10 months ago
A philosopher - Enter the chat
10 months ago
CageOwner​(dom male) - The 6th best poker player in the world went bankrupt because he insisted on repeatedly taking on the top 5 players.

World population is 8 billion people. Why pass up on the second most suitable partner out of 8 billion because he doesn’t quite match the (presumably) most suitable partner.

Summary: Don’t settle but be realistic.
8 months ago
TigerBDSM​(dom male){looking} - NO.
The ONLY expectation are those that appeal to you.
It can be something simple to highly regimented. it just has to mesh with you.
YES the dom must provide the proper atmosphere, but if his world does not mesh with your world, then a relationship will not happen.
BUT
If a person just seeks the escapism, the kinky sex, the "play" of the lifestyle, then many can have fun with many and not care about a relationship.
Have fun everyone and enjoy as much of the lifestyle that you need.
2 months ago

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