How it started for me

     I met rose the same place i met my other online subs, Omegle. We where RP partners first, Then i started to Dom her online. We always had fun together. We talked a lot outside of the Dom/sub dynamic and got to know each other. but i dont want to make this too short an entry. 

     We role played every day. A long story that mostly focused on sex. I kidnapped her, took her to a ranch where she was forcefully trained to be a slut for anyone who paid for her. She would be trained to perform any sex act or kink, And we ment ANY. Now of course this story and setting was agreed upon by the both of us. She wanted this cause in an online roleplay we don't have to worry about consequences. Please anyone who reads this be smart enough to know that In real life consequences are very real and you should think things out before doing any of the more extreme kinks. Whipping someone's back into ribbons should ONLY be in online roleplays In my opinion. I shouldn't have to say this but I'm sure we have all heard of or know someone that proves otherwise. 

Warning for this next part. I will be talking about Beastiality. If you do not like it please skip this next paragraph. If talking about it breaks any rules please tell me and i will alter this blog entry. Thank you. 

     Now Rose enjoyed a lot of the rougher kinks, Not to mention a size queen in the role play. She enjoyed the punishments and the beatings, Acted up a lot just to get the whips, and couldn't wait till night where she sleeps with 13 inch vibes in both holes turned to high. But when we turned to animals it was hard to turn her away. She loved beastiality in the role play. Specially the horses and the dogs. She started to act good and behave for the trainer, me, when it was her turn to take a horse up her ass. She was on her best behavior when she found out that spending the night with a room full of dogs trained to please girls. She was bla about pigs and other animals. But practically lived with the horses and dogs. I had to force her to move on, and only managed to do so when I agreed to add horses to the list of rewards. 

END OF BEASTIALITY TALK. 

     We eventually met up a few times. Nothing happened though. She wanted to give ALL of her firsts to the one she ended up marrying. But we did get to know each other much better, and eventually started to date. Long distance dating is hard but meeting every 3-4 months helps. We would both save up and eventually fly to meet the other. We where together for 3 years give or take a few months. And I loved every second of it. Being with rose was one of the happiest memories I have. And the 3 years I was with her i had improved myself so much. My self confidence, happiness, and my depression improved leaps and bounds. Just to be clear. Being with her didn't make it improve by itself. I was encouraged to improve myself so that I could be a better person for her. Now that I am no longer with her the improvements remain. And I am still working on myself. I wasn't using the relationship as a crutch. But motivation. 

     Anyways. After 2 and a half years I had enough saved up for not only a flight...but for a ring. As soon as I got off the plane and saw rose i ran up, dropped to a knee, and purposed. She said yes and it was the happiest day of my life. But life wouldn't be any fun if it didn't kick you down when you are at your highest......

    So like i said before while i was learning what kind of Dom id like to try and be i was also researching kinks. Some where easy to learn about. Like anal and how much someone should clean beforehand. Or pet play and what's the limit between that and degrading them as an animal. Which I learned isn't as fine of a line as I thought. 

   When i roleplayed I also tried to put this knowledge into action when i could. Now obviously I wasn't roleplaying the whole cleaning process before anal. But I did order them to clean themselves in prep for it. For the most part it people enjoyed the attention to detail. I was even stopped a few times and asked why I did something the way I did. So some subs even wanted to learn and my RP skills improved a lot. Though I wish I could say my Dom skills improved as well. 

   I wanted to learn as much as I could about the various kinks. So that way i can say why i do not like it. So instead of just saying " cause it smells' when asked why I don't like fecal play (which never comes up thankfully) I just say " not only is the clean up annoying as hell it also has a high risk of several infections that could be harmful to you in the long term. Also it smells" 

   I also learned about some kinks I'm not sure i should mention. They came up surprisingly often in roleplays so i learned what i could about them. Doing my due diligence and all that good stuff. Not to mention i was getting most of my online subs from omegle. And people on omegle are just weird. I should know...im one of them.

    Now correct me if i am wrong. But i learned that public, done right, is one of the harder kinks to actually do. Mostly cause of the research involved. Sure you can just go to an adult theater where nobody would really care. But that's too easy and boring. Id rather have more risk involved. I found out that the Dom, with the subs help, stakes out parks, bathrooms, movie theaters. Trying to find where is the best spot to play in public with a minimum risk of getting caught. The Dom keeps track of how many people are in a park each day or night, Which movie tanked in the theaters so would probably have no one seeing it, Or which restaurants have a reputation for people screwing in the bathroom. Looking at you McDonalds...

    With my newfound knowledge i once more got a sub from omegle. We discussed terms, rules, limits (which she understood i would push the soft limits) and so on. I'm proud to say it lasted about 4 months before she found a BF and asked to leave to be with him. At the time I was in no position to try and bring her to me or take care of her so i gave my consent. Got an invite to the wedding a few months after. I skyped in to watch and it was nice. I noticed she had a collar on and knew he had accepted her just like she submitted to him. Idk how they are doing now. 

   The next few subs left me after a few weeks cause they wanted a rougher Dom, or someone like the guy from 50 shades as I was once told. The one that I remember the most I met soon after that. And i will  never forget the name Rose knight...

     So I found out there are several types of Doms. soft Doms, Hard Doms, Daddy Doms, even TPE Doms to name a few. But I didn't know what kind of Dom I wanted to be. So i went back to what i know best. Roleplaying on omegle. I used interests such as sub, Dom, and so on to find like minded people to RP with. Now as anyone who has been on omegle knows the male to female ratio is roughly 90% male to 10% female. So it was not fun to find women to play with. And then there was setting up a RP, keeping their attention, and so many things that would make them leave right from the start. But again this was back in omegles glory days so the amount of people on there was at least 10 fold more than today. 

    So while roleplaying on omegle I would try out different Dom types. and i learned which i could be and which I certainly am not after a few months of several roleplays. I learned I am not so much a brat tamer or a hard DM. I like setting my rules and wont hold back on the paddling when a punishment is needed. But the more hardcore pain stuff just wasn't for me. Mind you this was all going on when I was around 9 and getting out of a long-term relationship with my Highschool sweetheart so I guess you can say this was also me finding myself.... May need to change the title on the first post hahaha. 

    But no matter what I kept it to roleplaying. After the first few terrible attempts to be a Dom, or well be and insta Dom (thank you FeistyMinx for telling me the term) I was gun-shy. Specially since some of the articles ive read, and videos ive watched where basically scare tactics. i wasnt as proficient at surfing the web as i am today. So when i just googled " how to be a Dom" and clicked the first few i found then...well they wernt very informative or nice. Some of them where basically just saying girls wanted to be treated as slaves and its a mans job to do so. Which i know know is what a few Subs want. But most definitely not all of them. So it was a trash article. 

    Another article i read was from the subs point of view and basically described how the Dom made her so reliant on him that when he left her she didn't know how to be an adult and ended up back at her parents not knowing what to do with her life since she had no skills besides sucking cock. So that's what she did until she was arrested for prostitution. Now that i am more knowledgeable i can see the several issues with this article. As I'm sure yall will see as well. For starters she must of been a young dumb 18yr old when the guy got his hooks into her. And he was a TPE Dom from the sounds of it and quickly controlled her life. I cant say for sure if she just let him or if she was blackmailed since the article never clarified that. Next the Dom himself. TPE or no a Dom should guide the sub to better herself and work on bettering himself as well. Not just in sexual ways but in life as well. It was clear he was just using her for sex. I hate to call him a Dom at all but he was dominating so i guess it would apply. but with her getting controlled when young, and him just using her as a fucktoy and nothing else. Well it wasnt a healthy sub/dom relationship at all now was it.

   So with , i wanna say, 6-7 months of roleplaying to just find what kind of Dom I wanted to be ive settled on being a soft Dom and a daddy Dom. I even tried being a switch for a bit but could never find a good female Dom to RP with properly so who knows. Maybe ill give it a try again in the future. Anyways while i was roleplaying the times i was a soft dom. Doing the pet play, slight humiliation, bondage,. Or being the daddy Dom to the littles. playing with their stuffies with them, making sure they had a pacifier, playing at the parks, before having some gentle fun in their pink princess bed. I found I enjoyed it much more than the girls who wanted to be chained to a dungeon and whipped with a bullwhip. IT WAS JUST IN A RP!!!!! No females where harmed in the making of this superhero backstory.....minus the superhero part LOL

   But i wasnt just learning what kind of dom i wished to be. I was also learning about the various kinks. Which im still learning about to this day. 

Buttttt ill leave that for tomorrow. I enjoyed reading the comments thank you everyone who has read it so far. 

     So this all started when I was around 19-20. a little background, i was always the bullied and abused. Never having any power or control over basically anything in my life. Having to give up on a possible future to help support my family, which I didn't mind too much, but still. Lack of control.

    Well i was searching around the internet bored as hell one night. And i came across a site by the name of omegle. Now omegle has gone down over the years, mostly bots and people selling pics, but thankfully i found it when it was amazing, and i loved every second of it. I quickly found the sex section and went there most of the day. I didn't take me long to find out about roleplaying as well. 

    Now since i was still new to the world of kink i was more than willing to play any role. I mostly just wanted to please the person and try to find someone to play with for more than an hour. And i did find a few people to talk with and learn more, explore more, and hang out with a lot more. It really  helped me come out of my shell and be able to express myself more. 

   Now most of the women i talked to wanted to me to be dominant while they wanted to be the submissive. I found this amazing. I was fascinated, and, amazed and, wanted to learn more. So that's what i did. Whichever kink the girl wanted me to do i went and researched afterword's. Bondage, anal, Public, little, degrading talk, humiliation, Temperature play, orgasm control and so on. I was fascinated with it all and wanted to learn so much more. 

   As i did my research i noticed my roleplaying getting better. Then i got my first online submissive. I was obviously very new and didn't know much of what to do. And I am ashamed to admit that I was basically just giving stupid tasks and ordering her to sent picture or video evidence.(i can just hear the comments now). Obviously it did not last long at all. Im surprised she lasted a week. But obviously she left cause I was just being a horny prick. The next few i was doing the same thing and soon realized that my approach to all of this was wrong. So i did what i do best...learned

    I went online and found what a Dom is supposed to do. I learned that there are several types of Doms and I needed to find out my style and needed to explore more. 

  And i think ill leave it here for now.