This is not a post attacking anyone in particular
More and more I am learning that subs are capable of being abusers too. Don't get me wrong, yes there are plenty of predators out there who masquerade as Doms and give us bad names. No, I completely recognize and acknowledge that fact. This post is not to diminish the ones who are struggling to find a "real" Dom.
Fact of the matter is, abusers exist on all ends of this lifestyle. And it fucking hurts.
Let me provide a common example I've come across personally often.
"I'm a brat, I need a Dom who has the strength to tame me!"
"Okay, what are your favorite ways to be tamed?"
"That's YOUR job, you're supposed to figure that out!"
That is an extremely unhealthy and downright abusive mentality to have. It puts all the pressure on one party to live up to a certain ideal and goal that is not being communicated in any way, no negotiation of any parameters, no respectful communication of desires and consent.
If you wish to engage and play with any sort of punishment involved, there needs to be communication of what that should look like at the very least. Consent has to be given for what is allowed and wished for, not to be assumed.
This is not a direct attack on brats, I know a lot of you get lumped into a bad category but it's the most common example I can think of currently. Thanks for reading my rant... I'm so very tired.
