One of the first questions I get asked is what brought you to this lifestyle? Are you sure your submissive?
There really is a longer explanation, the sexual deviances I have and feel have been bottled up inside for far too long.
As a young girl I fell for the ever juvenile if you show me yours I’ll show you mine. I didn’t even know what it was just that it was like an outie belly button while I had an innie. (Remember very juvenile age here). My high school experience I was the virgin that was only the bar girl underneath. The bad girl when no one was looking. Logging on to the family computer, waiting for that dial up to connect, then “innocently” going into all the aol chats. Surprisingly for me at the time, once my real age was given, not many ran. I had progressed from showing my pussy to learning how to play with it. Being young you could really only take it so far I thought. Rubbing against all sorts of things. This new online approach had me learning what felt even better. Then came the first boyfriend who taught me that it felt really good when someone else was playing with you. Sadly for him, I chose to remain a virgin. ( I know now I was just a cock tease).
There were always these thoughts in my head about what I was feeling, if what I was doing was right or wrong, why did I feel that need to be bad but not let anyone know. What I was being taught outside my mind was that anything not the norm was wrong. I let that follow me through my first marriage. More in love with the idea of love then the man. Tried to save my marriage by letting out a few of my fantasies and desires. I bought my first vibrator, hello orgasm, I bought pretty outfits, I even offered a threesome. I realized quickly it wasn’t me, it was him. In the bedroom I was the one dominating and he was submitting except when it went from vanilla to experimental. He made me feel like I was unconventional in what I was wanting and while the word was the right choice the feeling was not. He was my first, the one that popped the literal cherry but he was not the one I needed. He was just the catalyst to making me realize what I needed and wanted was far bigger and better then ever.