Hi reader.
My profile gives an introduction of what I am. Personally, in my mind, that's a different story. I been readed others blogs and comments and some of them make you dream. Some well they make you want it. Whether it's a story or what happened in RL. Me include. Which brings me to this, my first post on my Blog.
See I was a sub got the taste when I was in my teens. Didn't know I was doing it to myself. By burning and cutting. Without getting into the details man it was good. Then in my 20's got involved with a woman that knew how to push all my buttons. For a long time. We grew apart like people do but that left a taste in my mouth not as the sub but as the dom.
Found a woman that at first was a vanilla relationship but she knew what I wanted and she herself had sub tendencies. We grew and it was perfect. We were happy and had plans, always talked about our future and what we were going to make of it. You guess it reader what begins must always have an ending. I seen signs and tried to work with it. More and more I was called less and seen less of each other. Said sometimes life is hard so don't sweat the little things.
Lost people defending her. Telling them they don't know nor understand us. To the point they or I walked away from each other. Then after 4 years my mother found she had cancer and I lost it. Have scars on my knuckles from it. Put my hands through a door and wooden fence at work. For a year she fought for the life she knew was up. My partner in life and as a sub promised me the world. Till 6 days after my mother died. Then my heart died twice. She left cause and I quote, "she had to."
It's been almost 3 years now. About 6 months ago I started on here. Started chatting with some people. Mostly hi and a couple of conversations of likes and why we like them. I lean heavily to being a dom and still have lots to learn. I still like my own pain but in ways that only a sub can do. I don't know what people think just what I feel and my own thoughts are. My heart and emotions still seek what I lost but in our core isn't that what we as a human need. Yes in an dynamic our bonds we make are always stronger cause those bonds are on a level where every part of us are exposed. Some maybe more then others. It's not a weakness in our design. It's why we need our other half. It's not till then we feel whole or at least, me.
So that's my introduction. A nerve open to you. Stroke it or pull it, pleasure or pain. Cause for me I like both.
