So pulling from a writing on a different site I am hoping to open a dialog or at least a thought for us to chew on for a moment.
The gist of the writing was more about how just because someone is 21 doesn't mean they should be told they are to young to claim a Top role (Dom/Master etc).
And basically IF they have the KNOWLEDGE and have put in the effort along with that knowledge, I agree.
Example being if a 21 year old entered the lifestyle at 18 they potentially have 3 years of knowledge in being said Top title.
Unfortunately the majority and yes, even myself, have automatically assumed (hate when I realize I fell into that ass) that they are less than they claim based only on the information of their age and role.
Two problems I realized I personally need to address and was reminded of tonight.
"Wisdom does not come with age but with KNOWLEDGE"
So back to our 21 year old Top with 3 years of WISDOM.
Why do we mock or question them but give pass or not blink an eye when its (lets say for discussion sake) a 45 year old.
Even more so and where I really want to take this is why at ANY age it is only a topic or concern for those in a Top role? Knowlege or Wisdom in the role of choice or lifestyle.
Why are we not holding those of us in bottom roles (sub/slave/pet/lg) etc to the same standard? We should. Holding accountable and verifying that the knowledge of what it is and ability or skill to submit/bottom.
Why do we not question a 18, 21 or even 43 year old bottom role how they can claim that title or verify their knowledge level in what they claim to need it want? In my opinion we should.
Knowledge is NOT for just a certain age/gender/role. It is also NOT just one sides responsibility either. Not saying one has to know EVERY thing before claiming a tag/title BUT some knowledge and responsibility toward knowing the why and how of what one claims to be.
Actually, in some sense, with all the topics of "Fake" or not "true" Tops, you would think that bottoms would want to have the same or more so knowledge than the top side. If nothing more than to know if the wool is being pulled over your eyes. (Safety)
Also, to be responsible and enlightened enough to know the why and how of your level of submission or such.
Again, the 21 year old bottom tends to be seen as either easy prey or inexperienced. But are they truly? What if they have gotten up everyday over the last 3 year's and put the effort in on learning and practicing their bottoming role? What about that 43 year old bottom? Do we question or verify that they have anymore or less understanding? We need to.
Don't you think it to be as important that a bottom role knows exactly the why and how of their chosen role? I do. I think because we haven't that we see so many miserable, broken or confused bottoms. The ones who keep claiming they can't find what they need but can't define what why or how they need or are able to submit.
Knowledge is the responsibility and accountability of anyone and everyone. No matter role, age, gender or time in the lifestyle. We need to stop the assumption that starts when we hear nothing more than an age and top role of those we meet.
Do I think we should just blindly stop questioning young(er) as to there skill set and knowledge? Hell no. I just think it need to be across board and not continued as the double standard. I think anyone should be asked and be able to discuss the level of knowledge whether by number of years or skills learned.
Would love to hear your comments on the matter.
What do you do to verify the knowledge of those you engage in ? (top/bottom role)
Do you think there is a reason we give bottom roles a pass but not toward top roles?
Finally what knowledge and length of time do you require of the opposite role of yourself? Example: how long should a role be learning/gaining knowledge before sticking to a title of either side of the coin? 3 years, 19 years, instantly?
