Welcome to the playground let me start you off on the first and foremost in everything we do: Consent!
I usually try to add some humor or analogues to my writing. After the last few weeks however, I just gonna get to the point and blunt here!
Want to touch ?
Want to participate ?
Want to be respected?
Want to not have your ass handed to you?
Its really quite simple if you follow one simple rule:
Its No til Yes.
Do you have consent to ____?
The answer is no until you hear yes.
How do you hear yes? You open up your mouth and ASK!
If you don't hear, see Yes or otherwise get approval the answer is NO. Period.
If you hear No that doesn't give you consent to then bash that person, get butt hurt or assume you know better. You don't do it! Period.
Why didn't they say Yes? Who knows but until you ask or get to know them better you will never know. Start there. If they don't respond, move on.
But don't ever think that you have consent because they didn't say No. Unless they said Yes you are pushing consent. If you insist to proceed without asking until they say No, you will have already violated consent by the time they are screaming No!
By the way, THEY then have the right to call you out, be butt hurt and KNOW they will Not Trust you further. Period.
See that's why Consent is important because its the first step toward Trust.
You want them to Trust you? Start by letting them know you will respect the Consent they may or not give you.
To those of you that get Asked: For the love Kink, know what EXACTLY you are consenting to!
You put on your profile that you want xyz and get asked if you want to zyx. Do you know exactly the consent you are saying yes to? Do YOU even know what you say you want to say Yes to?
Sorry, but saying later that you said Yes but you didn't understand or didn't like it doesn't give you the right to give to then bash that person, get butt hurt or assume they should have known better. Period.
So please, its really very simple: Consent is No til Yes.
To get it you ASK
To give it you Own it.
PSA out!
