Sarah’s world

I have red flannel sheets coming which remind me of Lauren- small dark smiling and vibrant. I made a move to go down on her once while spooning her on her bed and watching tv.  She gave me a shy look and stopped me but said she’d always been more attracted to women than to men although men “seem to want to fuck me.”  Lauren’s apartment exuded color and WARMTH, I really liked being there, and her bed was made with soft flannel sheets and a velour blanket.  She later gave me a lilac colored velour blanket “since you loved mine so much.”  I should’ve taken her hand in yoga class, I wanted to very much but I wasn’t sure (did she like me? Like that?) Later we talked about it, when we were dating briefly, and she said she would’ve died/loved it. There were comfort items everywhere at her place and these were new to me because my mom disapproved of them, my mom preferred only white colored walls and basically uncomfortable things.  I would like to sit at Lauren’s rustic wooden dining room table and again eat matzo ball soup with her that we made together.