From the beginning BDSM was my comfort, my escape into a world where people cared. People were accepting and amazing. The further into it, and as i got older. Everything changed. Things began to become more sexualized. Which domt get me wrong, can be and is fun.
However, not exactly what I was truly connected to. So I turned away, I thought the problem was my sex drive. Up until recently, I blamed everything except BDSM because of the feelings and experiences ive had. Until, this man was so obsessed with me, he enjoyed just smelling my feet.
This is when it hit me, I craved the emotional aspect more than the physical. If you know me though, that doesnt make much sense. Typically, im pretty good with emotions and communication. Unless it comes to me, which bdsm was helping me because id jump into a dynamic looking for someone basically to just say "you need to do this or that or else".
Emotions have always been weird for me. As ive never fully understood nor was ever taught them. Which is why I try to be focused on growth and education. Which brings us back to bdsm and healing. In my experience with bdsm, it has taught me about patience, rejection, pride, disappointment, growth, and the importance of education; just to name a few.
True healing in my opinon, is about taking all of these and remembering our own relationship with ourselves. When we apply the same effort we put into dynamics, into ourselves. Its like magic. 🥰
Feedback is always wanted and appreciated. Feel free to correct, share, or comment 🥰